Recently I saw a Buzzfeed article about 34 completely legitimate reasons to never date a feminist. Like most people I could laugh and enjoy the satirical humor of it. Then I looked into where this idea came from and I ended up David Hon's Article "Why I'll never date a feminist." But lets take a look at his claims and see which (if any) are accurate.
Claim 1: Look hard enough and you'll find a reason to hate men.
Validity: Truth. I don't have to look further than you, however I have enough sense to realize that not all men are as terrible and close-minded as you.
Claim 2: "They've been told there's a wage gap (I disagree)"
Validity: Lets look at the link he provided. It is for a video that I watched on the Myth of the Gender Wage Gap. It was done by a group called "PragerU." And I looked into them to see the actual credibility of the video. Turns out it was done by a man named Dennis Prager who after doing a little research is very conservative. Additionally, I couldn't find where he found the statistics he used in the videos, therefore they really shouldn't be accepted as valid. However, if you look at the United States Bureau of Labor Statistics, you'll find document after document of officially recorded data that proves the validity of the wage gap.
Claim 3: "That there’s a culture of rape on college campuses (I also disagree)."
Validity: I know firsthand that there is a culture of rape on college campuses. Even my own school was under federal investigation for a Title IX complaint. And the biggest problem is that no one believes the victim. We saw this with Brock Turner getting a shortened jail sentence because it would "severely impact his life." But in this case we also got to see the survivor's letter about how her assault affected her life. We also saw all kinds of people post letters of support from Joe Biden to myself. But there are still people like Dave Hon who want victims and advocates alike to believe that rape culture is BS and their claims are false. But what's so funny to me is that most of the times they don't ask for much, just for someone to believe them.
This leads me to Hon's next point that political issues are now in romance. But this is WHY there is such a huge problem with rape, dating violence and sexual assault. Its equated with sex not an actual crime. I love the metaphor that "Rape is about violence, not sex. If a person hits you with a spade you wouldn't call it gardening." This is true and it disgusts me that you would call this a hateful culture and try to portray all men as the innocent victims. Yes, I will admit that rape is something that does not discriminate. As a peer educator at my school we make a point to emphasize that. But what you don't understand is that rape is something real. And it happens to too many people.
While he tries to appeal to more people by taking the position that Brock Turner should have gotten more than a six month jail sentence (of which he served about three months of it). But citing Wikipedia for your information on the case really doesn't do your credibility any justice. And while many people are wrongfully convicted because of inequality in the legal system, you cannot blame feminists for the corrupt justice system.
His next round of statistics are things that is widely agreed on as a problem, like that fact that mothers are more likely to get custody of a child, you he doesn't address why. Check out those reasons (which Hon omitted) here. Then Hon lists some very vague trends in the inequality that favors women over men. My favorite being that "Women are extremely less likely to die in war-time combat." Not only is this terrible wording but he also fails to address why women are less likely to die in war-time combat: for a majority of America's military history women were excluded from combat arms, which is where a soldier would be mostly likely to be killed in combat.
I will say, I agree that its far more challenging to date someone "across the political aisle" however, ideological differences is not necessarily a bad thing. Author Jessica Valenti's book Full Frontal Feminism includes a part where she talks about her rules for having sex with someone and all of them include respecting your partner in one way or another.
His tone quickly changes when Hon calls these issues personal and not political because these anti-one gender rhetorics are rooted in a previous bad experience (Hon's words not mine). However, look at recent politics and gender inequality has become a bipartisan issue.
Overall, I found it surprising but sadly unexpected that some people are still so close minded and misinformed.
