Feminist [n]: A person who supports feminism. That’s it, that’s the definition dictionaries all around the world supply. It simply defines a person, male or female, who advocates the feminist cause. And yet, despite having a set and simple explanation, there still seems to be an incredible amount controversy. The word ‘feminist’ has joined a long list of bad words, somehow warping itself into a million different meanings for different people. Along the way, a concept so uncomplicated became taboo. The word has become synonymous with hating men, being lesbians, always angry, and ugly. In retrospect, it’s no wonder there’s such a stereotype surrounding feminists. Because in order to adequately understand feminists, there needs to first be a clear understanding of feminism which our society seriously lacks. Everyone has such a loud, and radically different opinion on feminism that the true meaning has been lost. No one seems to be able to agree with each other, and so no one wants to understand.
Because of this miscommunication we’ve brought forth a wave of ‘anti-feminists’ and ‘meninists’ who go against everything we’ve set out to achieve.
I can’t speak for every woman, because I’m just one person. I can’t pretend to know what being a feminist means for every single person, because I don’t. But I do know what it means to me. There a millions upon millions of opinions regarding what is and what should be, and in no way am I trying to state that my view is in any way better or more important than anyone else’s. This is yet another opinion on feminism, true, but in my own personal opinion I feel like it’s still worth listening to. Is that biased? Probably.
The root of feminism is equality. It’s the ongoing fight to be treated equal, to be seen as an equal. It’s not an effort to make women better than anyone, it’s the right to be just as important as everyone. We’re not demanding special rights or treatment, if anything we’re refusing special treatment. All we’re demanding is the same rights available to everyone else. Is that so wrong? Is it wrong to want the same opportunity? The same pay? The same consequences, both the good and the bad? Because of these stigmas, these venomous ideas that feminists want to punish men and be seen as superior our cause is weakening. Women are turning against each other, dragging the feminist name through the dirt. Women are refusing to be called feminists so that society will accept them. Men who wish to take part in our cause are ridiculed. All because of rumors and standards that shouldn’t exist.
A woman shouldn’t have to work twice as hard for a job she’s equally qualified for simply because she’s running against a man. This isn’t us wanting handouts, it’s wanting equal opportunity. A young girl shouldn’t be shamed and sent home from school, missing lessons and falling behind because of what she wears. Instead of teaching young girls that their wardrobe is distracting, teach young boys not to be distracted – teach them respect. A woman shouldn’t be the butt of a joke, or held up to antiquated standards. Being feminine shouldn't be derogatory (i.e "You hit like a girl!) and there shouldn't be rules mandating what is and isn't ladylike. The first response when demanding equality shouldn't be wether or not men should be allowed to hit women. A woman shouldn’t be called a ‘slut’ or a ‘whore’ or a ‘prude’. Her sex life does not define her, and should in no way devalue her. A woman shouldn’t be terrified to walk the streets because she’s afraid she’ll end up in the news, facing an unjust trial. A woman's success shouldn't be seen as a man's failure.
Wanting equality for ourselves doesn’t mean we don’t want equality for others. That means breaking the stigma that men can’t be raped, it means women serving just as much time as a man for a crime she’s committed, it means abolishing the idea that men always have to pay the bill, it means erasing the the gap that divides us.
It’s not a war on men, it’s a war on misogyny.
I am a woman and I am a feminist. I’ll admit, I like it when doors are held for me, and chairs are pulled out for me, and I like being complimented (not cat-called, there’s a huge difference). But those things don’t make me less of a feminist, because feminists don't come in specific molds. They come in different shapes, sizes, sexualities and genders. I am a feminist because I believe in equality. I believe in equal treatment, even when it doesn’t benefit me. And despite there being a million and one published articles about feminism and what it means to every author who’s written it, I’m proud to say that now there are a million and two. Because it means I’ve contributed. It means I’ve spoken out. It means I’m part of the cause.
I am a feminist, and that's okay.
