So if you're reading this, you probably know what I'm talking about because the title spoke something to your heart. Let me just line things up. I have such an incredible group of best friends, a boyfriend that loves me more than I could have ever imagined, a family that is gentle and compassionate, and a Jesus that guides me with a light that can be hard to follow, but always leads me to growth and grace upon grace. If you just read that and you want to punch me in the face, hang on a second. It might have come across to you that my life seems to be in line, or that everything is perfect. I'm about to talk about something that really sucks. That's the best way for me to explain it. It's a feeling that makes you want to stay in bed all day, a feeling in your gut that makes you question if people care about you, a feeling that allows Satan's voice to overpower god's voice.
Loneliness.
Surprise, you can feel alone even when you have a huge support system rallying for you. You can feel like the only person in a room of 50 even if you've grown up with them. You can feel lost in a crowd at a theme park, but that is rational. Feeling alone when you're at a party with your closest friends doesn't seem rational. But it's okay. And it happens to everyone.
Here are four things I have learned about loneliness
1. Feeling alone prompts satan to creep into my life and tell me lies.
But the gospel has taught me that I am never alone because I have Jesus. I mean, Jesus literally promised that He would never leave us. Jesus ain't a promise breaker. "...behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age.” (Matthew 28:20)
2. Loneliness reminds me that I am always going to be OK.
Personally, I have such a hard time being restful. If I have down time I tend to think about what my other friends are doing, probably without me. Obviously they're just doing their own thing, like I do all the time. But when I am feeling alone, I think that they are intentionally excluding me. LITERALLY WHAT?! I need Jesus, y'all. I love 1 Corinthians 10:13. It says "no temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And god is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it." I LOVE this so much. The temptation that I have to question my friendships or my worth when I am feeling alone, despite having the sweetest friends, family, and Father, is COMMON. Hallelujah, I am not the only one! Jesus will provide a way out. For me, that is writing or singing. Maybe it's going for a run without music so I can pray. I know rest can be difficult, but when you go about it in a way that makes you comfortable and allows you to hear the Lord speak in your life and cast away the loneliness. That's what I'm talkin' about!!!
3. Loneliness teaches me to be comfortable with my own thoughts.
When you are physically alone, like no one is in the room or the house, or you're in a cubicle by yourself working overtime, Jesus is so willing to flood into your thoughts. Unfortunately, Satan is too. When I am physically by myself, my mind wanders quickly and sometimes the direction is not always positive. Being alone has taught me to fill my time with productive actions. Choosing the gospel over trash TV, or reading a book that I really love rather than sitting on my phone. It's the little things.
4. It doesn't happen so that god can laugh and torture me.
I mean, think about Jeremiah. He basically tells him he cannot get married or have children because they will die and will not be mourned, they will refuse burial. He tells Jeremiah that he cannot enter any house with a meal or sit down to eat or drink. He also tells him that He will bring an end to any voices of gladness. Well dang. OK. BUT LISTEN. Jeremiah felt encouraged. He knew of god's faithfulness and that He would restore the kingdom of Israel for His people. Jeremiah loved enough. Although Jeremiah had no one, he knew that god's promises would stand true. The people of the land would come back, and even though Jeremiah would not outlive their return, he felt at peace and accompanied.
Amen.
