Peace.
We are all familiar with the term, but if you're like me, you rarely feel it. Filled with worry, anxiety, and consumed by my busy schedule, I rarely have time for myself. Those who know me know that I'm constantly "going" and always seem to worry. This semester, I've taken a closer look at myself and have decided to focus more on, well, me. Although I've had success with doing more for myself, I still didn't feel the peace I am so desperate to feel.
Until this week. I found myself in my room looking over notes for an exam and realized that regardless of how I did on it, everything would work out the way it's supposed to. If you're like me, you get so caught up on striving for perfection that often times you forget that everything is in God's hands. I'm not saying you shouldn't strive to get into that top-tier graduate school you've got your eye on, I'm saying look at your options; your plan might not be the same as God's plan. For two years I've been striving for one program and have consumed with worry over whether or not I would get in. Now I'm contemplating a different program, and although choosing a school is nerve-wracking, it brings me a sense of peace to know that I have options. I'm going to do my best in all that I do, and if it still isn't enough to get into my top program, that's OK. That's God's way of saying it wasn't meant to be and that He has something better in store for me.
For once I'm not super stressed about finals and I owe it all to changing my perspective. By changing the way I look at different aspects of my life, I have achieved a greater feeling of peace that has put me at ease. Of course I still feel nervous about how well I need to do in school, how I should have internships lined up, and whether or not I stand out on my résumé. But I'm human. God's acceptance is more than enough. As long as I'm doing what I'm supposed to be doing to achieve my goals, God will lead me in the right direction. Trust me, when you begin to focus more on doing the right thing rather than focusing on being the "perfect" student, you'll start feeling this sense of peace.
