College is a social experience, as well as educational. For most, it's the first time being away from people you have known the majority of your life. In some cases, that's for the best. In others, it's really difficult to say goodbye to these people who have seen you change throughout the years. They have witnessed your fangirl phases, your struggle with anxiety, your first relationship. You have inside jokes and memories to call back on.
Remember in the first grade, when all it took to make a friend was sharing the same favorite color? I wish college friends were that simple. But as you get older, as with everything, meeting new people becomes more complicated. Meeting those people you truly click with is more about chance and knowing the right people who can lead you to them. In middle school, that scenario was less complicated since everyone was still growing and flexible. But by now, our personalities have hardened and friendship has become a bit more difficult than both liking the color blue.
Of course, that's not to say it's impossible to make friends. Opportunities exist in the classroom, in student activities, in going to campus events. This is easier for some than others. (I'm looking at you, students that live on campus.) And even then, you may meet a few people initially, but there's always this plateau afterwards. There's a relief in finding a group of people to stick with that you kind of forget to keep searching for more. As the semester goes on, it only gets harder since everyone else also seems to have fallen into a rhythm.
While there is gratefulness for the friends you do have, sometimes you just selfishly wish you had a little bit more. Because your friends won't always be available to you. Schedules are different and the workload is different. Regardless of whether or not you have one friend or ten, there are going to be plenty of moments when you are alone in college. Sometimes that's great because you need to get work done. Other times...it's lonely.
In high school, you got used to seeing all of the same faces. Practically everyone knew each other, or at the very least knew the names of each other. You were constantly surrounded by people. Meanwhile, college leaves a lot of gaps. And because it is a social experience, sometimes you can't help but to walk around envying the people who are with their friends.
At the end of the day, college leaves a lot more room for feeling alone. Whether that loneliness is in friendship or even in relationships, each are valid and something you will probably experience while there. It is important to remember that there are others who feel the same and that loneliness is also a part of life that makes you appreciate the people you have even more. However, feeling that empty kind of sadness also sucks, a lot. It's okay to admit that too.
