People always say that college will change you and it does.

I came to college young and naive and in a lot of ways I still am but not quite as much as I was then. I can’t really say if college has me better but I can say it has made me more human. When I came to college I had a very specific idea of right and wrong; honestly, I was pretty judgmental. I hadn’t experienced many things so I hadn’t learned anything about how grey life really is.

My freshman year a close friend of mine died in a car accident. I had never lost someone that unexpectedly before. I had never lost someone that I had texted a few days prior and had plans with that she would never be able to make. I learned a lot from losing a friend. I had never been much of a crier but college made me realize it’s okay to cry you just have to choose the right people to cry in front of. People who don’t consider you weak for crying, people who will hold you and hug you and make you feel safe.

My sophomore year a dear friend’s dad committed suicide and I was the one to tell her about it. College showed me what pain looks like which is a part of growing up. College makes you grow up rather quickly. Later my sophomore year I went on a blind date with a boy that gave me more butterflies than any other guy before him. I fell in love with him and started to learn the ropes of what relationships are all about. Some days they are easy and some days they are hard but if you love someone you just keep working at it. College taught me what it means to be in love, which is a part of growing up.

I have made a lot of mistakes in my three and a half college years. I have said hurtful things that should’ve been left unsaid, I’ve done things that were stupid but I don’t regret any of them. College taught me that I’m not perfect which is a part of growing up. Learning to feel pain, learning to feel love, and learning not to expect anyone to be perfect has made me more human. I forgive more easily than I did before college and I have an understanding for people’s mistakes. I have learned that most things in life are grey.