I've been out of the closet since I was 14, and for the most part, society has been okay and mostly accepting. Even though society has come a seemingly long way with acceptance and inclusiveness, (even though that shouldn't even be a problem, to begin with), there are still many questions that arise in mostly heterosexual individuals about a lesbian or gay lifestyle. I feel it's important to make the world aware of these very popular questions, some are humorous and some are just plain stupid.
Here are the worst questions to ask a lesbian:
1. "Are you girls sisters? Best friends? Twins?"
To be honest, this is one of those questions that are excusable to ask, because there's always a likely chance that two girls going shopping, getting their nails done, or just plain hanging out could be just friends, or even sisters. Truthfully though, it can be quite annoying having to deny it and say "no, she's my girlfriend," and even sometimes receiving a blank stare as the response.
2. "How do 2 girls 'do it'?"
OMG, this is the question that most likely comes up most to any lesbian out there. If you're a human being, you might feel uncomfortable talking about your intimate moments with a stranger, or even a friend. Is it really necessary to ask something so personal? I think sometimes people don't even realize how personal and even awkward it actually can be. Instead, if you're really curious, just Google it!
3. "Have you ever actually been with a guy?"
Some women in our community may say yes, and some may say no. What's it matter? Whether you have or you haven't, if you are gay, at some point you just know, and that's OKAY. No need to try things out that make you uncomfortable.
4. "How can you be gay, you don't even look it?"
What does gay even look like? Is there a specific dress code that i'm unaware of? You sometimes will not know someones a lesbian if you take one glance at them, but it doesn't mean they aren't. Style is style, and sexuality is sexuality, they are not related!
5. "What type of lesbian are you?
There are specific categories of lesbians, and some do choose to identify themselves as one, like a lipstick lesbian, or a butch, but not everyone wants that! Some of us are just ourselves, and some don't like any labels at all. Either way, it's okay!
6. "You're a lesbian, so does that mean you hate men?!"
ABSOLUTELY NOT. Men are just as valid as women, we are all equal. Just because we are attracted to women physically, does not mean we can't have guy friends, or even appreciate the attractiveness of men. We are not all man haters, I promise!
7. "Does this mean you're always gonna be virgin?"
This is a common question topic that comes up, that irks me. Who cares? There can be many arguments approving or disapproving this. I'd say physically, yes. but mentally, absolutely not!
8. "How many cats do you have then?"
This is a humorous one, because who knows how being a cat lady and a lesbian became a thing.
9. "Is 'gay-dar' actually a thing? What does it tell you about me?"
Yes, it really is. For those we don't know what gay-dar is, it's when a lesbian/gay person can sense when another gay person is around them, or point them out in a crowd. Seriously though, it's not like a magical power, it's just a sense, so it cannot tell me about you, it happens when it wants to.