Growing up I had always known I wanted to get married. It was one of those gut feelings that I felt so strongly that I couldn't ever deny it. I would look at wedding magazines at my beautician's salon, and I'd dream about all of the pretty hairs-dos I could have, or the dresses I might be able to wear. At that time, in the mid-90's, the high hair was all the rage, and I wanted a dress that was off the shoulder; just like Belle's from Beauty and the Beast. However, there was one thing I didn't really think about when it came to getting married; the family I would get upon marrying. Now mind you, I was only 4 years old at the time, and even with my heightened intellect it never occurred to me that I'd be a part of a whole new family some day. Maybe it was my love of Disney movies; where you only ever met one of set of parents whether they be the protagonist's or not. Maybe it was because despite my parents being divorced I really felt like I had one solid family unit up until that point. Who knows. Anyway, I should get back to the topic I have intended for this article.
I have always had a tightly knit family, and when it came to meeting my fiance's I didn't know what to expect. I couldn't imagine being so close to anyone else's family but my own. The first time I really sat down with his family revealed so much to me because they seemed as down-to-earth and loving as my own. The first night I came over to his dad's house we had a sushi night. I had never made sushi before, but his dad was so helpful and kind when I messed up the first California roll. His mom and sister were there too; despite the fact that my future mother-in-law and father-in-law had been divorced for years. They somehow managed to remain friends, and to me that was a breath of fresh air. The conversations we had were light and friendly; learning about each other and learning how to be a new family entirely.
The next big thing was meeting the rest of his family. My 20 year old self knew that I was in for a big surprise when it came to meeting the bulk of his family because his father is the youngest of 8 children. The night I met them not even all of the cousins came, and we filled 6 tables at a local restaurant. Meeting his aunts, uncles, and grandparents was a whole new experience for me. I come from a large family myself, or so I thought, but they took "large family" to a whole new level. They're loving and opinionated; loud and benevolent. They make me excited to start my own family within theirs. Every Christmas we gather in the grandparents' house, and we have to all spread out in multiple rooms during gift giving because we can't all fit in just one room. The gift giving includes a white elephant gift exchange; seemingly because if we tried to do separate gift givings we'd all be spending hundreds upon hundreds of dollars. I don't know if this is the actual case, as I don't know where the tradition started, but from my outside perspective that's what I assume it to be.
In less than 300 days I am gaining a whole new family. I'm gaining a father-in-law who has been there more times than I can count. It's a relief to know he tries his damnedest to be there for his son and I. I'm gaining a mother-in-law who is as brilliant as she is beautiful. I'm absolutely terrified of playing Scrabble with her, but I know that she is going to rock as a grandmother because her intelligence is sure to be passed on. I'm gaining a step-mother-in-law (boy that's a mouthful) who is kind and loves her new family just as much as I know I love mine. She and I have been with the family close to the same amount of time, and it's almost like we're joining our husbands' families together; at the same time. I'm gaining a sister-in-law whom I love dearly; just as if she was my flesh and blood. She brightens up the room when she smiles, and her kind heart and determination are something I hope she can help instill in her future nieces and nephews. Lastly, I'm gaining a husband who is more than I ever thought I'd deserve. He's kind, patient, loyal, vivacious, and absolutely hilarious. He makes me happy, and most importantly he makes me a better person.
This family that I'm gaining is unlike anything I ever thought I'd have. Sure, I always wanted to get married, but I never thought about what that'd entail. At least not at a young age. As I've grown I've become more understanding of all that goes into a family and marriage. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure I still have a lot to learn. However, I know that with the family I have I will be able to withstand anything life has to throw at me, and that in and of itself is a blessing. I'm absolutely thrilled to know that I'm gaining the family I never knew I wanted. ♥
