Yes it’s scary. Now that that is out of the way, remember what Alfred Lord Tennyson said, "‘tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all". So once you’ve made the decision to let love in consider the simile “love hits you like a ton of bricks”. It will be intense, but those bricks only look hard and unyielding when they are actually filled with butterflies and bubbles and dopamine and puppies, just a plethora of things that make you inexplicably happy.

These, and there are millions more, are clichés that have spread like wildfire throughout media, songs, books, movies – anything that portrays love, and I’ll admit, much of them are true. You look at a person you love and your heart will swell. Spending quiet time alone is just as magical as attending an EDM concert together. The mere thought of your love going downhill is Gut-Wrenching. So if you are ever seeking love advice take it from someone who genuinely writes about it, they know what’s up and do their best to find the right words to describe the agony and thrill that is love.

The best way to find real love is to first and foremost be yourself. Unless you’re committed to some lifelong method acting experiment, it is not worth your trouble to act differently around a potential significant other (SO). The pure elation you will feel when you know that they love you for exactly who you are is better than finding out you won the lotto (maybe it’s exactly like winning the lotto actually).

Everyone is not good at being themselves at all times in all settings. I have friends who can flirt online, in person and from across a room. For me, apparently you have to live with me for at least two months (specifically in the summer time) to get things going. But hey, if it works for me then I’m not going to kick it to the curb. Get to know your strengths, get a firm handle on them, and then use them at your will. You’re looking at me like “easier said than done!” , but I’m telling you being in love pushes you out of your comfort zone, finding love should do the same.

You are going to fall in love with a person’s soul, and you can only know their soul when you know them, so start talking. If talking about the weather is how you feel comfortable approaching someone that’s fine, but make sure to explore more personal topics such as favorite places to eat, the best seasonal sports to watch and play, what organizations you’re both into and anything that allows you to learn more about the other person besides the climate they live in. Again, test the comfort zone with little steps and dig a little about family and pets, aspirations and dislikes so that your map of them can become more extensive. Go ahead, fall in love with the small things, because that’s what make up their soul.

Love is a lot easier if the first date is free. No one has to pull out their wallet for some extravagant meal or expensive movie, concert or play tickets. Go for a walk anywhere and spend the time getting to know each other. Sure a coffee or small snack (I’m talking croissants and cupcakes not a whole crepe) is acceptable if you’re feeling peckish, but focus shouldn’t be transferred to food. The best part of the date should be the other person not the activity.

Nothing about love is easy, because the three pillars of healthy love are effective communication, equal appreciation and eloquent compromise, none of which are simple to achieve. Love is a dance of balance. Love is an enigma, something as strong as granite and yet fragile as a piece of twine. So let love grow but remember to handle it with gentle hands.