Dear Alex,
Oh, what a hard day you've had. Look at you, sitting slumped over on that old wooden bench outside your dorm, overlooking the park, with puffy red eyes and a great big frown.
Look at that test in your hands. You really just made a 50 on a test? An environmental science test? Didn't you take that because everyone told you it would be easy? Go ahead and make yourself feel a little better by saying, "Oh, it's an honors class and it's really hard!" Go ahead and say, "Oh he just didn't give me all the partial credit he usually gives!"
You can reason all you want. But man, I know you. I know where your priorities have been these past few weeks. I know how much commitment you gave to your studying. I know you told yourself that you studied hard, but what did you really spend that time doing?
Your mom says to go to office hours, your boyfriend does all the math with you to help you realize you're going to come out alive, but you know what you need to do to feel okay.
Let's do some questions with answers to talk you back down to Earth.
1. Are you stupid?
No, you are most certainly not stupid. You have talents that are unique to you specifically, and they are talents that come together to make one intelligent woman. You may not be an environmental scientist, but wow, you are brilliant. You can write (you must be decent, you've got all these suckers reading your stuff right now), you can reason, you can talk your way into ANYTHING, you build relationships very well, and you can lead in ways that the world needs to see more of. Alex, you are not stupid.
2. Is this the end of the world?
If it is, WOW, this world was fragile to begin with. Of COURSE it isn't. You did the math, your grade is still safe. Your grade can take one hard hit like this, but make sure you keep the hard hits under control. The world will not end. If you respond to this in the right way, the world could see its best days soon. If you come back with more focus, more discipline, harder studying, and more commitment, you could see improvement in your grade that you think is unimaginable right now. Along with that, the hard work you put in is going to make you the best version of your academic self. So, no, this is not the end of the world. You will not flunk out after this one test. You will still graduate, you do not need to go pick out your new cardboard box to call home. You will survive. But, you just have to come back strong.
3. What do I do now?
Well, to start, you need a really good milkshake and 30 minutes of just laying in the grass in the sun. While you're doing it, think about something in this situation that you can celebrate. Here are some things you can celebrate right now:
You are a student here at one of the greatest institutes in the world.
You are a strong young woman with an incredible future ahead.
You are handling this failed test pretty damn well, if you ask me.
You are eating a milkshake in the grass while the sun is shining in a clear blue sky on a beautiful Thursday afternoon.
Your hair looks really cute today.
After your moment of relaxation, make a plan.
What are your expectations for your study habits? How about this: after every class in your study time, go ahead and make the flashcards for everything you just learned, and go ahead and start practicing with them. Getting ready further ahead will help. You also should focus more in your lab section, and work on making better grades on your labs. You also need to put away all electronics and distractions while studying from here on out. If you go into your test with a more solid foundation of preparedness next time, you'll have more confidence in your knowledge, which will take you into the land of excellent grades! I hear it's pretty swell there!
Alex, you can sit there and cry on that bench until the sun goes down, and you can make excuses until the sun rises the next morning, but I know that nothing is going to change until you make it. So get your butt up, go celebrate the fact that you're alive for just a moment, then get to work.
When that next test comes around, you'll be just fine, I know it.
Godspeed, my friend.
Sincerely,
Yourself.
