Tuesday
[At Sigma Tau Delta Fraternity House]
Chad (to friends): Bros, let’s throw a party this Friday! I’m gonna invite that cute girl, Erica. We really hit it off when she came to our tailgate last weekend.
[At Zeta Theta OmicronSorority House]
Erica (to friends): I heard Sig Tau is throwing a party Friday, Chad will for sure be there. I like really was feeling it between us last weekend at the tailgate.
Wednesday
[At Sigma Tau Delta Fraternity House]
Chad: I’m gonna text Erica and tell her about the party. Anyone have that mass text that we were sending out earlier? I want as many girls here as possible, if we have anything less than 14:1 ratio I’m gonna be heated, dudes.
[At Zeta Theta Omicron Sorority House]
[Erica receives a text message from Chad]
Erica: Guys! Chad just texted me and like it seems like he really wants me there this weekend right? Like he thought ahead enough to make sure I’ll be there. I should show up maybe an hour in so I get the, “You coming?” text. I wonder if he does that.
Wait… Todd just texted Megan the same thing word for word. WTF. #Offended. I’ll wait a bit to answer.
[Chad receives a text message from Erica]
Chad (to friends): Boys, she definitely wants it. Dope.
Friday
[At Zeta Theta’s brunch]
Erica: “K, so there are like three parties tonight but I’m good just hitting Sig Tau. Megan wants to go to Alpha Beta, but she’d never leave there so we veto. Sucks to be you Megan. Also, can I borrow someone’s skort?”
Megan (Erica's friend): “Are you going to talk to Chad?”
Erica: “Yeah, we’ll probably be glued to each other the second I walk in.”
[At SigTau House, 9 P.M.]
Chad: Fellas, tonight is gonna be LIVE. Did everyone send out their text invites for tonight?
Todd (Chad’s friend): Yeah bro of course, I blew it up. You wanna spew up some girls with me?
Chad: Honestly dude, I kinda just want to see Erica. Yeah sure there are gonna be a bunch of cute girls riding through, but I really had fun with her last time she came to SigTau. She’s really cool.
Todd: Bro, come on! There’s a whole squad of babes over there in the corner. We hang out with Zeta Theta all the time. Let’s just chat with these girls and change things up a little.
[Chad and Todd approach the "babes" in the corner]
Girl: Hey!
Chad: Ayyy, what sorority are you in?
Girl: Um, I’m in Tri Gamma!
Chad: Whoa, you’re in Tri Gamma? That’s dope. Wait, what’s your name?
Girl: Zoe. Zoe Rodrigo.
Chad: Rodrigoooo!
[The two then proceed to take several shots together.]
[10:20 P.M., Erica and her friends enter the SigTau house]
Erica (to herself): Perfect timing, I’ll say my hellos and then find Chad. I’ll try not to be too obvious.
[10:25 P.M., Erica sees Chadtalking to Zoe Rodrigo]
Erica (to herself): Ok, I’ve been here, and we made eye contact, but no hello? Like fine, same. JK who is he talking to? She’s cute but not much. I’m going to go talk to him when the convo slows.
[10:26 P.M.]
Erica (to herself): Umm, this isn’t okay. She’s smiling a lot. So is Chad. I wonder what they’re talking about. What if he’s telling her the same things that he told me? Oh my god, he actually is just a robot who doesn’t care about me at all.
[Chad is extremely belligerent, and still doesn't notice Erica.]
Chad (to Zoe): Hey Zoe, what kind of bagel can fly? A plain bagel!
[Zoe Rodrigo starts laughing hysterically and smiles at Chad. Chad sees Erica across the room.]
Chad (to himself): Ayyyy, Erica rode through! I knew she would. Couldn’t resist me if she tried. I’ll talk to her in a few minu… eh, I’ll get to her when I get to her.
[Erica is becoming visibly anxious, and finally approaches ]
Erica: Hey Chad! What’s up?
Chad: The ceiling, dude. (laughs)
Erica: What did you do today?
Chad: Went to gym. Lifted all the weights at the gym. They had to buy new weights because I lifted all of them. Then I downed some protein. *chuckles* Frat.
[Erica rolls her eyes]
Chad: Hold up, let’s get one more drink and then head back to my place.
Erica: I’m sorry, do you think this is working?
Chad: No, I’m sorry. I really think you’re a cool girl and I’d love to get to know you better.
Erica: Wait, I love that. I get it, it’s like everyone’s trying to make you into something you’re not.
Chad: Yeah… So Netflix and Chill?
Erica: I’d like that a lot.
