I grew up watching America’s Next Top Model. I remember strutting my stuff up down the living room as Tyra Banks and her panel of judges tore young girls apart on national television. As I grew older, I discovered the Victoria's Secret Fashion Show and I would binge watch these tall, beautiful, super skinny women parade themselves down the runway while (insert popular band/singer) rocks out in the background.

Also as I grew older I realized I could never be one of them. My growth spurt stopped barely past 5ft. 3in. In seventh grade and like most girls I gained weight and got curves. Not to say I became obese or I hated my body, but I did not meet the standards of the American high fashion industry, and I was okay with that. I had other things going for me. I learned how to play musical instruments and dance. I started college and subsequently moved out of the house. My dreams of models had been forgotten.

Until one day I was looking through Craigslist (I know it's super sketchy) when I came across an ad looking for commercial models, no height requirement. I send in some old photos and I got a call back from an agency. I made an appointment and I met with an agent the next week. The interest had created the spark. I soon started finding Facebook groups for models in Utah and photographers wanting to work with me. I found a start up training company for new models and I joined the classes. I was introduced to the world of modeling nobody else gets to see.

There is an entire industry of people who don’t look like most of the models you see in magazines or commercials. They are plus sized. They are petite. They have crazy tattoos everywhere. They are diverse not only in appearance, but background. They all get together and take pictures just for the fun of it too. There is an abundance of creativity and brilliance shared between models and photographers alike.

First of all, through the industry I have found a new confidence for myself. I am able to utilize my skill set to create art that people admire. I get to meet and make friends with wonderful people that I wouldn’t get to meet. I have seen some amazing photography and models that I now look up to whether they know it or not. In many ways the experienced industry is so supportive.

I also saw how hard the industry is. First of all, a lot of the work in my area isn’t paid. I don’t live near New York or Los Angeles so photoshoots are usually TFP or time for photos. Although its is (usually) mutually beneficial to the model and the photographer since both of them are doing it for fun, it does not create a lucrative industry. When there is a paid shoot, it often EVERYONE becomes instant competition for a measly $100-$200.

I have also noticed how quickly models in particular burn out. There are constantly new faces coming into the industry every day. They are eager for the first couple of weeks and then they slowly fade out. In my opinion it has a lot to do with the lack of money going into the industry and also because photographers are able to pick and choose the models they want to work with whereas models typically do not. I will normally have to approach photographers or I will have to respond to their ads when they are looking for models to fulfill their concept. I may or may get cast. Photographers, for obvious reasons, like to work with models they have worked with before or at least met in person. It creates a barrier for newer talent to break. I am lucky to have worked with some well known photographers who like to shoot with me enough to want to shoot with me more.

My experience in the industry has definitely pushed my boundaries. I have had to learn the right and wrong ways of marketing myself. I have learned the importance of investing in myself such as paying for Instagram or Facebook Promotions. I have learned how to become a professional and work with people. Being a model is like being a salesperson, except the product you’re selling is yourself. I have a strong dance and movement background that many models don’t have that makes me attractive, but I still need to learn how to work with studio lighting and my facials. When working on set I have learned how to want to be a model the photographers want to work with again.

While the Utah modeling industry isn’t the most lucrative things I could be doing for myself, it has definitely become rewarding. People ask what do I expect to come out of it all. Honestly, it is a hobby. It's my stress relief. It's the thing I look forward to after a long week, and I will continue on in the industry as long as I find my solace in it.