Every Ex Teaches Us Valuable Lessons

Every Ex Teaches Us Valuable Lessons

Breaking up becomes easier to do.

We all have them and they have all taught us lessons about life and ourselves, exes. They all stick with you in some way that reminds you why you aren't with them anymore. Some people break-up and stay friends while others choose never to speak to one another ever again. I've had both types of break-ups. Regardless, every ex has a story and a lesson.

A lot of the lessons we learn from break-ups is what we don't want in a significant other. Whether it's an annoying habit like smoking that's a deal breaker, or just a personality trait that doesn't mix well with your personality. I'm an ambitious and independent person.

I have an ex that taught me I want someone whose not clingy and has their own goals in life because he was very much about making sure everything one of us did included the other. While your significant other should play a big role in your life, you should still be able to have your own friends and your own goals.

Another lesson you can learn from a break-up is that people are not always what they seem. I had a friend whose ex's true colors came out when they broke up. He ran around talking about her like they had never even been together.

People can be mean and ugly but sometimes you don't see it until it is too late. Next thing you know you are working against a reputation that your ex has made for you simply because they felt hurt that you found out you didn't need them anymore. If anything though, the fact that they are talking bad about you should reaffirm that you do not need them.

Another thing you learn from breakups is that you shouldn't listen to your friends when it comes to picking your significant other. They might think they know what you need but they really don't and sometimes they are just as clueless as you are about someone's true colors. They are coming from a good place but only you know what you need in a significant other and have the ability to determine if someone fits the bill.

Exes come with a lot of responsibility and while it is upsetting at first having to break up with someone or be the one being broken up with everything happens for a reason. We live and we learn and that's the way it should be.

Cover Image Credit: Instagram

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To My Boyfriend's Mom

He loves you more than you could ever imagine...

Without you, there would not be a him, so first things first, thank you.

1. Thank you for teaching him to love a woman the right way, to put God first, and YOU before me always, the respect he shows you is so attractive, and you deserve it.

He talks about you like you hung the moon, I don't doubt for a second that he will be an amazing father one day, I owe all of that to you.

2. Thank you for giving me a chance, learning to love me when you knew your son was doing the same.

I can't speak for my own first impressions, but hopefully mine was not THAT bad...when we both slapped him on the arms for his rude remark at the same time, I knew our relationship was already blossoming.

SEE ALSO: Finding A Husband In College

3. Thank you for every meal you have ever purchased me.

And chocolate, and candy...you know just as well as your son does that food is the way to my heart. Especially Taco Bell and cheesecake ;)

4. Thank you for your advice, suggestions, and opinions...and asking for mine

Whether it's telling me to slap him for being a smart a$$, or you're asking me about color swabs for your kitchen makeover, you come to me as if I am your own, and I am so honored to give you my own input.

5. Thank you for including me

You never fail to leave a spot for me, and I love family dinners/outings with you guys just as much as I love my own!

6. Thank you for teaching your son to never give up, and that if he does it is only to better himself, or it's the only choice he has left.

He is so focused on his future, he wants the best for himself, and he is constantly reminding me that these are things that YOU taught him, you deserve to be so proud.

7. Thank you for letting him love my family, and allowing me to love yours.

He is so loyal and loving to my family, and I don't even have to ask myself why because I see him with you and yours. Thank you for letting us double up on holidays when we can, and making sure we get the most out of our time with you!

8. Thank you for being his best friend.

I think of him as mine too, but I couldn't think of a better person to also hold that title, you know him better than anyone else and you always will.

9. Thank you for teaching him how to treat a woman

He is constantly telling me "You sound like my mother." Thankfully earlier in our relationship, he told me that the woman he wants to be with, should do just that. He always tells people who try, "No, no one calls me by my full name except my mom and my girlfriend."

10. Thank you for your honesty

We all know that he and I can drive you crazy sometimes, thank you for telling us like it is, and making sure we know you still love us anyways.

SEE ALSO: 8 Tiny Lies Every Young Woman Has Told Their Best Friend

11. Thank you for teaching him to work as hard as possible in anything and everything he does.

I have never met anyone with such a desire for success, he and I are constantly discussing how we can better our futures, and I know exactly where his drive comes from.

12. Thank you for teaching him to clean up after himself

Even though sometimes, it takes him a minute to do so.

13. Thank you for teaching him how to love, and letting him love me.

I have never felt so loved by a man, probably because anyone else who came into my life was just a boy. Thank you for your unconditional love for him, he is your entire heart and that is so easy to see, I am happy to share his with you.

You and I both know that even years from now we will both occasionally probably be closing the fridge that he left open, cleaning the crumbs he dropped, demanding he take a shower after playing soccer, or reminding him 20 times about plans we made weeks ago, we both share such a great love for such an amazing man. I could never be more thankful that you brought forth into this world such a comforting, supportive, protective, steadfast, driven, handsome, and hilarious guy. Thank you for everything you do for him, for me, and for us, I love you a lot!

Cover Image Credit: casey

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To The Guy Who Showed Me That I Deserve Better

I know now that I shouldn't settle for less; I deserve more.


I was afraid to let you in at first and I thought that was a mistake. Now I know I should have been afraid. Because in the end, you did hurt me. You made me believe that you were different. I thought I could trust you but I was wrong. In the end, I looked stupid. My friends told me I should watch out for you. I didn't listen. I thought that maybe you changed, that things would be different.

You deceived me. You broke up with me and then started dating someone the day after. There was someone else all along. You made it seem like it was my fault. Like I deserved it. And I started to believe you. I started to believe that I deserved to get hurt. That I messed up our relationship.

I changed who I was when I was with you, which you were fine with. That's the worst part. I compromised myself for a guy who didn't care for me. I acted differently around my family when you were around and I hate myself for that. It wasn't major changes but I still didn't like who I was becoming.

I now realize that I need to stop blaming myself. I didn't do anything wrong. You did. You treated me badly. You started arguments with me in front of my family. Some days were good and we were happy. Then others were not. But I know I shouldn't put myself down because of it. I know I did my best but I also know that I deserve the best.

I shouldn't let anyone put me down in a relationship. I shouldn't feel like everything is my fault. I deserve better. I deserve more. There's no point of hating you. Because in the end, I learned a valuable lesson. I shouldn't let a relationship or a break up keep me down. No one should. I shouldn't let a guy change who I am inside. If you can't love me for me, then I don't want you. I know what to look for now. I don't want this to happen to me again.

With the lessons, I learned and the pain I endured, I only have a few things to say to you. Thank you. Thank you for showing me who you really were. Thank you for ending it when you did because I wouldn't have had the guts to. That's all I have to say to you.

Most importantly, thank you to me for being strong.

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