Closure is one of those things that will wake you up in the middle of the night only to play an intense game of 20 questions with you.

Was I not good enough? Did I do something wrong? Did my text message not send? Did their phone die? Would double texting be weird? Admit it. You have asked yourself these questions at some point.

These thoughts are often substituted by a simple question to ask if something is wrong. That is when you realize you were better off wearing the rose-colored glasses.

People get so lost in the terms of closure; a borderline obsession takes over the individuals' mind to understand where the relationship, on any level, went wrong.

Closure makes you feel as if your affection and time are inadequate because the other person is no longer able to return the same level of affection or refuses to accept the attention you tried to offer.

Whether you sought out closure as a reason to see their name pop up on your phone one more time or to try and change yourself to fix the situation, closure forces you to over analyze the current and future relationships.

Closure diminishes the love and attention you have to offer someone because you curb it based on past experiences. You go into your next relationship trying to conform to what went wrong with the previous relationship because you are scared to be hurt again. You want to improve from what happened so you do not go down that path.

That is not the way it should be.

Relationships are meant to complement, not complicate, your life. The person you are with is meant to help you grow and have fun in the process.

Any growth and experience you gain while you were with your significant other, or your “just friends,” has the potential to be crushed the moment you gain closure. The answers as to why they can no longer be with you consume your everyday thoughts.

We convince ourselves we need closure just because we hang on to the slim chance that maybe we can turn this relationship around. Maybe they will come back.

You need to wake up from these thoughts.

If someone wants to change you and how you act around them, then you should probably change their presence in your life.

If someone is not able to appreciate who you are as a person, then they have no right to tell you that you are not worth their time.

The love, time, attention, friendship, affection or effort you have to offer is never wrong within in reason. Every person offers these in different forms.

No one has the right to tell you to or even make you question if what you bring to the table is enough.

If all the closure did was tear you down and convince you that you are unable to be with someone than is the closure even relevant to you?

You need to stop rereading old messages, stop pulling up their Facebook to see “who is Tina,” and you need to stop hanging on to every word they provided as to why they decided to step out of your life, if it was explained at all.

Appreciate and learn from what the relationship and friendship had to offer you, but do not let it deter you as a person.

Everything you have to offer is right -- just maybe not for them.