My first semester in college was hard. Simple as that.

Now, don’t get me wrong. I made wonderful friends—friends I truly believe will be by my side for as long as I live.

Yet… It doesn’t mean things were always easy.

From the outside, it can seem as if everything is going fine. You’re doing well in your classes, you have wonderful friends, your social life is active—heck, you’re the life of the party.

But inside, things can be a lot different.

College can be incredibly lonely, more lonely than most let on. You’re thrown into a new atmosphere, with new people, a new home, and an entirely new life. With people who may not fully understand you, let alone remember your name, and all you have is a cell phone to call home and a webcam to look at the faces you miss and once spent every waking moment with.

Now, for those reading this and coming into college—this is not to scare or worry you, just to help you understand something.

Please keep reading, and soon you’ll understand my point.

There were moments I thought about transferring, moments I wondered if I truly had a place on this campus—many thoughts wondering if I belonged. And although I had these thoughts, most people didn’t know.

Because so often, from the outside we portray a persona much different from what’s going on within us.

Before sophomore year, I truly believed that I wasn’t made for college. I didn’t fit the college persona—my classes were incredibly hard, I wasn’t head over heels in love with my school, I was nervous and unsure about the idea of going abroad, and I just felt as though others fit so perfectly into the “college persona,” and I did not.

It wasn’t until this year that I realized something. And there is no doubt that this past weekend spent with friends who love me indefinitely, underlined this discovery. Here it is:

No one is made for college.

That’s right; no one is made for college. You are probably feeling confused and counting the people you know who are “killing” the college game. But let me attempt to explain to you why no one, and yes, I mean no one is made for college:

We are not made for a season in our lives. We aren’t made for our high school years, our early 20s, or even college. We weren’t made for a decade. And this is why depression and loneliness sweep through so many college campuses… We have the expectation that these years will be the best four years of our lives, and the moment they fail to live up to these expectations, our world collapses. But do you want to know something many fail to realize from this statement?

It is only four years. Four very small years of an entire lifetime… And for some reason they are supposed to be the best.These four years are what we were made for? I’d like to argue otherwise.

Today, I know this for certain: I wasn’t “made for college.” But do you want to know what I do love, and what I know I was made for?

I love my friends… A small, yet significant group of people who know my heart, and love me incredibly well.

I love my Young Life girls… High school girls who I see myself in every day, and who make my time in college meaningful.

I love what I’m studying… Pursuing writing has brought a joy to my life that can’t be matched. Whatever you do in life — pursue what you love, please.

I love my sense of purpose. Because that’s just it: My purpose isn’t college, high school, marriage, parenting, old age, or any age for that matter.

My purpose, as well as your purpose, is simply this: To love others well.

But there’s more: To pursue what we makes us tick, seek truth, find happiness, and essentially to live for something much greater than ourselves.

Because if we spend our lives believing we were meant for a period of time, we will spend those moments waiting for this “purpose” to click, and the second that period of time passes… We will wonder what we spent those moments pursuing, and wondering if that’s it.

This article is simply to say this: Look at your life, and look for the meaning within it. Don’t think the way I did — believing I was made for a certain four years and that was it.

Because that is furthest from the truth. We were all made for a reason, a reason far beyond our understanding. Yet, I know this much to be true: So often, we have the wrong reason in mind. We believe we were made for success and status...

So, my last piece of advice is this: All we were made for is to love others well, and seek purpose. And that is something we won’t find if we define our lives off four years.

I’ll leave you with a quote. Think about it. Sit with it. Reflect on it. And ask yourself if you, too, are doing the same?

“I used to be afraid of failing at something that really mattered to me, but now I'm more afraid of succeeding at things that don't matter.”

—Bob Goff