At the Schuster Gallery Art Show last weekend, there was an interactive art project by Lee Steadman. On the wall was a giant swirl of lines, tangling together and eventually forming a circle. A sign next to it invited the viewer to take a pencil and write some of the important "meetings" they'd had here at Gannon.
I added four different mini-stories. I'd already been thinking about the people I've met at Gannon. About to graduate, I've been looking back on the many experiences I've had here, and everyone who has come into my life, in various ways...
"I never saw it coming": the unexpected best friends
Coming in freshman year, I had the mistaken idea that the most important friendships freshman year were going to be with the people on my floor, and spent a lot of effort trying to make those happen. Actually, I'd already met and started to bond with a future best friend. College tends to throw you together with a lot of different people. There are bound to be some you didn't expect to get along with, or didn't really notice at first, who you end up becoming very close with.
"It was a bonding experience": the fire-forged friends
Sometimes, you end up being friends with someone that you never would have otherwise, because of a class, activity or group that compels you to work together or get to know each other. I've been on two retreats (and led one), a service trip (and will be leading one), worked on Totem, gone on trips to DC, Philadelphia and Europe, and worked in the Writing Center. Some of the people I met during these experiences, I probably would have been friends with had I met them in a different way. Others, I probably wouldn't have. Others I may never have met at all. It's nice to have some of these "obligation" friends in your life. They're often different from the people you would normally be friends with, so you get a different perspective from them, different examples of things to do and ways to act, and maybe some challenges to change in ways you wouldn't have thought of. And sometimes, this is how you meet those best friends mentioned above.
"This one girl I know...": the background characters
They've been in your classes or groups, but at some point you realize you've never really talked to them and don't know much about them. For me, these have mostly been in Campus Ministry. I was never really close with the people my year who were involved with it. We had done a lot of things together, and I could give a pretty good description of them because of hearing about them and having shared friends, but we'd never really connected. But you never know what kind of relationship will form if a conversation gets going with one of these people. On the way to the retreat I led two weeks ago, I got into a conversation with one of these people, and we both said how cool it was to get to know each other on a deeper level after years of doing things together.
"I'm not really sure why we never clicked...": the people I expected to become friends, who didn't
We all have a few of these. Unfortunately, not everyone you want to be friends with is going to want to be friends with you. A lot of these are related to the above: sometimes you’re really close with someone while working together on something or doing the same activity, but when that ends, and you try to keep the friendship going, they’re not on the same page. Eventually you have to accept that the friendship just isn't meant to be. I've been struggling with a bit of this lately; luckily, there are also...
"The first time we knew each other...": the people who reappeared
There are a few people who I met freshman year who I got along really well with... and then I never really saw them again for the next few years. Then I ended up in a play with one of them, then another play with two of them. Another person I sort of knew freshman year was in two of my classes this semester. It turns out that the good "vibes" we got from each other when we first met three and a half years ago are still flowing. We've twice had conversations for close to an hour after class, and are planning on hanging out more before we graduate. Neither of us can remember how we met in the first place.
"Why didn't I meet you sooner?": the people I didn’t get enough time with
Specifically, I’m thinking of all the freshmen I’ve met this year, especially the future members of the Trautman House, and mi amigo que sabe mucho más que el burro.
More generally, it could apply to all the friends I've had here. To all my close friends, thank you for making these years so memorable. Salsa dancing. Sandals sticking in the mud. "Drag racing" through the streets of Erie. Fish. Picasso's on a pseudo-balcony. Just Dancing. Impromptu post-class pizza. Paella. Water balloons on a roof. Candlelit mass. Sunset on Presque Isle. Pre-show hugs.
And to everyone else who's impacted my life, even in the smallest of ways, thank you too.
