A friend of mine recently showed me the movie "The Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind." It was one of those movies that I had always seen the cover of and thought "I should watch this" but never actually did, until last night. I knew I would like it because who doesn't like a movie with Jim Carrey, Kate Winslet AND Mark Ruffalo? Not only were the main characters fantastic, the story line was one to really make you think, which are my absolute favorite kinds of movies.
For those of you who have not seen this movie: the main point is that the two main characters break up and one (Kate Winslet) decides to go to the memory doctor and have the other (Jim Carrey) erased from her memory. When Jim Carrey's character discovers what she's done he decides to do the same.
This got me thinking, what if that were possible? What if there was some doctor who could erase one specific person from your memory and nothing else? Would you do it?
I think we all at some point have experienced something with someone that we sometimes wish we could take back. Maybe it's someone we had a relationship with and can't seem to get over. What if we would erase them and ultimately erase the hurt? Maybe it's a loved one who is no longer with us. Would it be better to not have ever known them? To not feel sad every time their name comes up or you're reminded of them? Maybe it's a parent who has done more damage than you feel any child should ever endure. What if they were just never there and you're left with the opportunity to imagine what they're really like? Would erasing them completely make everything better? Easier?
After giving this a lot of thought I realized that no matter how terrible someone has been to you or how much hurt you have been going through because of them, that experience is placed in your life for a reason. If we were able to erase every "bad" memory we had, we would never be able to learn or grow in the ways we are meant to. Even though at the time it sucks and can seem unbearable, years down the road you will be somewhere you would never have gotten to if you hadn't had these people and these experiences to push you there.
In some way people may view this negatively. "If this hadn't happened to me I wouldn't be such a negative person" or "what happened to the old me? I'll tell you, this person happened". Whether it's someone we love or someone we hate, they were meant to cross your path. Because there is no such doctor, the only option we have is to deal with it and make the most of whatever it is we are going through.
I know this is nothing you haven't heard before, but just take a minute to really think about it.
If I could erase a single person from my memory, I wouldn't. Every mean word, wrong doing, loss, pain, and sadness, has brought me to where I am and has shaped me into the person I am today. I wouldn't change that for the world.
