To put it blatantly, I have always been fat. Ever since I was little, I've been bigger than the majority of kids in my school. I wasn't taught at home that eating healthy and exercising were important, so it was never something I took to heart. I had terrible eating habits. I once gained 20 pounds in one year from simply eating too much, and yet, that wasn't enough to make me change my ways. As the years went by and I got older, nothing changed. My eating habits were still bad -- maybe even worse than before -- and as I continued to gain weight, my mental health went down the tubes. When I got into high school, I really started to hate my body. I realized how big I'd gotten, but I didn't take the steps to change it because I had no idea how. After getting my first job and graduating high school, I began to eat fast food more often than I should have and continued to do nothing about my weight.
And here we are now. I'm the heaviest I've ever been. My body has started doing things that it's never done before as a sign that something needs to change. I have a hard time walking in the morning because my ankles are so stiff and that makes it difficult to get down the stairs. I've been getting random dizzy spells and I just have to wait it out. My weight has affected my back the most. I experience a lot of back pain and it's become a normal day-to-day thing. Up until recently, I've accepted these changes as a part of my life now, but something had to be done. I looked back at all the opportunities I had missed to change my eating and exercise habits. So, I decided enough is enough. I don't want to gain any more weight. I want to be healthy and feel good about myself. I want to prove to myself that I'm strong enough to change something I've battled with all my life.
While it's only been a little over a week into this change, I've noticed a few things that changed almost immediately. My energy level has been more consistent. I haven't had a crash in the middle of the day like I did before I started eating better. It's nice not having to take a nap at 5 p.m. just to make it through the rest of the evening. I have also been full longer. While I have been trying my best to eat three meals a day, I've remained full from breakfast until dinner. Instead of lunch, I replace it with a snack, usually consisting of a fruit and almonds. It's a nice change because I feel the need to constantly eat. I've also noticed that I've been sleeping better. My back pain is still in full force, but I wasn't expecting that to get better within the first week.
It has definitely been challenging cooking all my meals and not running to grab fast food. It's difficult trying to make an actual meal rather than just throwing frozen french fries into the toaster oven. I must say my bank account is thanking me though. I'm just now realizing how much of my paycheck went to fast food; it's weird seeing how much money you keep when you don't eat all the time. Regardless of the difficulties, I'm going to stick with this, and hopefully I'll continue to feel as good -- maybe even better -- than I do now.
