We see it in movies. We watch it on TV. People boast about it at bars. They tweet about it on social media. The easy pick-ups. The easy turn ons. "Daddy issues" is a term often used to shame women for their behavior for almost any reason, often in a graphic sexual context. Women with daddy issues are seen as sexual objects to be controlled and manipulated by the patriarchy. They are seen as broken dolls willing to give anything away for love and affection. Their sex lives are highly criticized and judged. Any issues they bring up with their intimate partners may be seen as a "turn on" or something that will play well in the bedroom.
Definitions from Urban Dictionary describe women with daddy issues as easy, kinky and sluts to bring back to the bedroom. Ultimately, women with daddy issues are pawns to the patriarchy and men who see a broken relationship between a daughter and father as an opportunity for their own sexual prowess. We as a society have a culture dedicated to putting shame on women's issues instead of putting shame on those who get off on their pain. The shame should be on them and not us. Women should not be seen as "easy pick-ups" for their own misfortune. They should receive empathy, not seduction.
Urban Dictionary describes women with daddy issues as scores to be bragged about. What does this say about our society? What does this say about a culture that seeks to discover women with emotionally strained relationships between them and their fathers? There are women who were abandoned by their fathers as a child. Women whose fathers were verbally or physically abusive or were just absent in their life.
What does that say about those who seek to comfort them only to get laid and experience sexual relief? We as a society need to evaluate how we stigmatize people's pains, how we value male pleasure over female comfort. We shame women's behavior and praise men for scoring them in the bedroom.
And to the women who have been labeled with 'daddy issues' and objected to the sexual desires of the patriarchy, you are not alone. You are not an object to be manipulated. Urban Dictionary has no place labeling you a "slut" and someone who is easy to pick-up. You are not a sexual fetish. You are not defined by your promiscuity or what you choose to do with your body. No one should be getting off on your heartache. No one should be glad you have "daddy issues" when they approach you or want to sleep with you.
You are not an object for their desire. That shame is on them, not on you.
