The news of the massacre at Mother Emmanuel AME Church in Charleston, SC spread across the country and the world quickly. The idea that anyone would walk into a church, sit, pray, and read the Bible with a group of people for an hour, and then pull out a gun and fire magazine after magazine of bullets was unthinkable. Yet, that is what happened on June 17, 2015, when Dylann Roof killed nine members of the prayer group. On Thursday, Dec. 16, 2016, after only two hours of deliberation the jury found Roof guilty of 33 charges including federal hate crimes and murder. You can read about the trial here or find out more about the shootings here in the feature article in Time magazine. The hearing for the sentencing for Roof will take place in Jan. 2017.

I was just going to bed that night in June when my friend texted me and said something was going on downtown. She said there was a shooting at a church they kept calling “Mother Emmanuel.” I explained to my friend that the church was called “Mother” because it was the oldest and largest AME churches in the south. At least that was what I knew about Mother Emmanuel. As a native Charlestonian, I had heard many stories about the history of the church. It was at one time burned to the ground and another time destroyed by an earthquake. There were stories about the church’s leadership in abolition and fighting injustice of slavery.

We both stayed up and texted into the early morning hours following the unfathomable story coming from the news media. She heard the news that the pastor had been killed. “No! Please don’t tell me that,” I texted. I knew Rev. Clementa Pinckney from my years in the nonprofit sector in Charleston. Mother Emmanuel, under Rev. Pinckney’s leadership, was always involved in helping the community. He also served as one of our state senators serving as a voice for change. The thing I remember most about him was his smile and ability to make those around him feel comfortable regardless of race, age, gender, or religious affiliation.

The news continued to bring gut-wrenching blows. When the news that Cynthia Graham Hurd was among the victims, it felt even closer to home. I knew her as one of the librarians at College of Charleston. A total of nine dead as well as three survivors who will always live with horrific memories of that night. The shooter had left the scene and soon attention focused on finding him. He was later captured in North Carolina.

People gathered at the gates of Mother Emmanuel leaving flowers, balloons, and adorning the gate with Palmetto roses. There is an old legend about the Palmetto rose that I have heard many times during my life. The story says that during the Civil War, women would give their loved ones a Palmetto rose as they left for war to keep them safe. When they returned from the war, they would give the rose back to their loved one. No one thought to send the victims of the shooting out on that day with a Palmetto rose. No one thought they were going off to war, yet sadly it seems many are still fighting against injustice, inequality, and hatred every day. The nine who died at the hands of a young man filled with hate will not be returning home again with a rose for their loved ones.