It’s an absolute waste of time trying to pursue a man who leads with a warning about his relationship hesitation. If he says he doesn’t want to date and you're looking for someone who will be faithful, move on. Don’t view his unwillingness to settle down as a challenge or an opportunity to show him how great you are, or how greatly you can love him and change his mind. Don’t fixate on anyone who declares that he’s not a romantic option for you from the outset. Don’t convince yourself that if you can’t have this one guy, you’d rather not have anyone at all. Foolish conclusions like this will poison your heart.
If a man tells you he doesn’t want a relationship, please trust that that’s the case. I don’t have to tell you what happens when you decide to chase a man who states outright that he’s relationship wary. He will take as much as he can from you before moving onto his next victim. Some men lead with “I don’t want a relationship” primarily to test the waters — to see how far they can get with a woman without making any real commitment at all. They want to challenge your standards, and sometimes your morals. They will watch and wait, eagerly, to see just how much effort you’re willing to put into making them want you in the way that you want them.
Watch out for the warning signs, and don’t let yourself get played. If you do choose to move forward with a man who doesn’t consider you relationship material, don’t give the guy as much attention as you’d reserve for an actual boyfriend. If he’s not man enough to make you his girlfriend, you’ll have to be woman enough to walk — or run — away.
There are plenty of other men out there in the world who are looking for exactly what you are. When a man actually wants to be with you, you’ll know it because he will be—and without second thought. Committing to a woman and staying faithful to her is easy — as long as a man truly wants to do it. Remember that, and don’t let yourself get tricked into anything less than what you deserve.
