I’m definitely generalizing, but I see Greek life in three parts: friends, philanthropy, and connections. I see the point in rushing, pledging, and finding your second family. I see why people join and encourage everyone to rush. But sometimes it feels like people in Greek life want everyone to be involved.

I kept getting asked this semester if I was rushing. When I said no, they always followed with a sort of exasperated “Why?!”

And my answer isn’t long and complicated. I literally just don’t see a point in it.

Rushing and pledging have you working nonstop to gain entrance to whatever sorority or fraternity. I just don’t see a point in working myself to the bone to gain a group of friends, no matter how big or wonderful they are.

I’d like to not be obligated to go to mixers, formals, and date parties. I’m sure they’re fun, but I like my time in peace more often than not.

I really wouldn’t like to have a certain amount of mixers to go to, or search for a date and end up picking someone I barely know. My luck wouldn’t have me finding the love of my life but would end up having a super awkward night with this hypothetical person.

I know these people aren’t paying for their friends, but they’re working so hard for them. I’d rather fall into a small group of people that I choose to spend my time with. I like my friendships to happen almost by accident.

I get that these groups each have a philanthropy, and that’s great. I’m sure it makes them feel warm and fuzzy inside. But I’m not sure that everyone is enthusiastic about it. It’s off-putting to hear a girl announce, “Donate to the victims of the Parkland shooting,” while staring at her phone.

The whole connection part of Greek life feels dirty to me. It’s great to have an “in” but I’d rather work from the ground up in my career. I don’t want to be a published author because I knew someone at the publishing company. I want to be published because of the quality of my work.

I have friends in Greek life, and I’m happy to see them happy in their sororities. Some of them accept my disdain better than others. But really, don’t give me a pitiful look when I’m simply not interested in Greek life. I have no problem with it, but wipe that look off your face because you think I’m missing out.

And let’s be honest, I already have a second family, a third, and maybe even a fourth. I don’t need any others.