This is an open letter to all of you commitment-fearing men out there.

First off, I want to take a moment to thank you all because having this experience has helped me understand even more what I would maybe want in a real, grown man someday.

So let's dig in, you want all of the things I do to an extent but you can't seem to make that final step, and "commit" because as we all know the worse thing that could ever happen to your manliness is to treat a women with the respect she deserves. Huhhh, she did not just say that.

I know, I know, it's college. We all want to just "have fun," and don't take life "too seriously." Well I would agree with that I like to have fun, but my idea of fun is not showing up to a party with you and us going our separate ways because God forbid we be seen together and how dare I want to be introduced as the girl you are in fact with you just can't admit it. After six months the charades are getting old.

Now, everyone has had their fair share of heartbreaks. Boo hoo. Move on, be happy and if you decide we are going to be together, then we should be able to be "together" everywhere we go, not just when it's convenient for you. If she wants to take pictures, for the love of every breathing creature on this planet take a silly picture with her. Take her to the festival of lights because she's asked the last two years and really, really wants to go. Treat her like the Queen she deserves to be treated as because she's dealt with your sorry pathetic self for long enough. Treat her with respect because she's given you far more "second chances" than you know you deserve. And because even though you know you are hurting her you continued to keep things going because you needed things from her, but did not want her.

Secondly, you, like every other human on this earth, have a heart. I know I'm supposed to bash you to pieces here, but I know it's there deep down and I guess the reason I will never be able to hate you is because I owe it to you for finding who I really am. You forced me to love me so much after losing the one thing I put all of myself into. Which is HUGE, and that's where I can tell you is probably where you should start if you ever decide you want to take that step and "commit," you need to love yourself first. And both of us had different things going on, but I really hope someday you love someone as much as I loved loving you, because I would do it again in a heartbeat; not for you but for someone who was serious enough to deserve that kind of trust and love. Not just someone that wanted to continually use every bit of love and energy for their selfish soul.

Lastly, I want to say thank you for showing me how much better I can do, and that this is everything I don't want in a relationship. The feeling of not ever knowing how you really felt about me, or us. Waiting up night after night for plans to fall through, and by the end of it falling out of love with you because the happiness was gone. I wouldn't wish that feeling on my own worst enemy, but I am so happy I went through it because it has made me 100 times stronger than I ever knew I was. So here's for the memories that were made, even though the bad outweigh the good.

Here's to me and my new love for myself. Without you.