Dear Mom & Dad,
I am going into my sophomore year of college after a year of learning and new experiences. In that first year of being a naive freshman, I have been through nights that I didn’t want to end and nights that I didn’t think I was going to stop ever, and then there were nights where I couldn’t sleep and nights where I thought that I had no one. As much as I showed on the outside that I had it all together my freshman year, and as strong as I had tried to show you that you raised a girl who is as tough as nails and doesn’t take shit from anyone, I fell apart more times than I can count.
I sat there during my little breakdowns, not wanting to talk to anyone, wanting to just sit there and feel sorry for myself. Being home for three months after being gone for nine (the longest amount of time I have been away from you guys since the 6th grade three day Outdoor Ed trip might I add), I have talked to you both about things that made me realize, when I was crying in my room or driving to the river by myself to break things, I just needed to call you. You two are the only people who know me and love me no matter what. You have seen me at my best, but more importantly at my worst, and still wanted to support me and love me unconditionally. You guys loved me through my punk MySpace phase, to my emotional high school games, to dropping me off at college. I want to apologize. I should’ve called you every time I was down, and then some.
Mom, when I talk to you about heartbreak you made me remember how tough I am, and how much I should realize that life is too short to be crying over a dumb boy. You tell me that no matter who comes into my life, that my friends and family are going to be the ones I have forever and that I should never take that for granted.
Dad, when I talk to you about heartbreak, after you start making death threats to whoever hurt me, you make me realize I should never settle for less. You told me once, “I don’t understand how anyone would pass up a chance to be with you because I know how amazing you are.” Then you would tell me I’m that way because I’m your kid.
That’s just one of the many things you guys have talked me through. You guys have said things to me to make me know who I am and make me remember where I came from. I’m not sure how I went through my freshman year without getting your advice as much as I could.
To the incoming freshmen,
Call your parents. Call them when you’re stressed, call them when you’re sad, call them when you’re happy, call them just because. I don’t care if they called you in the morning while you were eating breakfast, or during dinner with your friends, answer their call. Talk to them, or at the very least tell them you will call them back and actually do it. You going off to college is one of the hardest things they’ve had to go through. Whether you’re their oldest, youngest, middle or only child, it will be hard for them and you, no matter what. They are going from having their baby in the house every day, to not at all for the next nine months. They don’t want to feel like they are becoming irrelevant in your life now that you’re not in the house anymore. They want to be involved in your life for as long as they can and they want to be there for you, if you let them. Please, for their sake and your sake, let them.
I know that you will think, “Oh my gosh, mom, we talked last night,” or “Dad, calm down I texted you,” and yes that is normal, but they miss you! It really doesn’t matter if the phone call is five minutes long, and just asking about how their day has been, or about the giant possum you just saw cross the street, or you just got an A on a test you thought you would fail, they will be happy you called in the first place. If I could go change one thing from my freshman year, it would be the amount of times I contacted my parents.
Back to my mom and dad, if you’re reading this, and have read this far, I want you to know that I love you unconditionally and I will always need to talk to you. I hope you never feel as if I am putting you off to the side, or “forgetting” about you, because that is impossible. You have made me who I am today and I will never be able to repay you for everything you have done for me, but I can try. 831.
