Being somewhere new is tough. You feel out of place, extra cautious, and more alert of what you say and do. This can be a new job, living in a new place, new classes, etc. Personally, I’m going through this change of being somewhere new right now. I moved to Salt Lake City, Utah from a small town in Indiana. Not only have I moved across the country by myself at the age of 20, but I will also be attending the University of Utah this fall as a transfer student.
Being a religious person, I also had the opportunity to attend a new church with fellow students at the UofU. Usually when we get a new job or are in the process of moving we get super excited, right? At least that’s what went through my mind constantly; I just wanted to move out and move on with my life, on my own. Well, here I am. I’ve been a resident of Utah for an entire month now, and that excitement I once had quickly turned to anxiety and a bundle of nerves. I felt discouraged by the way I acted when I met new people through church activities or just in public. That all changed after one short conversation I had with someone I just barely met. He said something that just stuck: Stop trying to fit in, FILL IN.
My whole life I have always had a mentally of needing to fit in, whether this be with fellow classmates, organizations I was a part of, and even in my own religion. Truth is, fitting in goes against everything that sets you apart from others. By trying to fit in with society or people, you’re sacrificing the beautiful things, which make you unique. Why? Why would you want to change who you are as a person for certain people or groups?
Doing so is allowing yourself to be a different person according to who you’re with or where you’re at. That’s what I struggled with the first few weeks here in Utah. I was too infatuated with trying to fit in with the groups or people I was with, instead of showing them who I really am by filling in. By filling in instead of fitting in we not only help ourselves, but we help those around us. What do I mean exactly when I say “fill in”? Filling in is to be who you are as a person, and fill in that person according to the needs of the group or circumstance. You see someone sitting alone at a social gathering? Go up to them and fill in their lonesome state. Little acts of “filling in” opens the door to much happier and satisfying times. It also shows others who you really are.
I think a problem in our world is we focus too much on trying to be someone else. Unfortunately, this is a world full of people trying to fit in. Many of us reading this are guilty of such, including myself. It’s time to change this state we got ourselves into and it doesn’t take much. A simple change of mind and acts can lead to a tranquil and more satisfied everyday life.
