We often catch ourselves searching for love. Turning every corner to find that special someone who makes our hearts skip a beat. Stop searching. Now.
Look into yourself. Fall in love with you before you even think of loving someone else. In order for you to ever know what love looks, smells, tastes, or feels like, you have to know what loves means to you. What loving yourself feels like.
So take a deep breath. Take a hot bubble bath. Watch your bath bomb explode into the water because it loves the water. It sizzles with passion as soon as it hits the steamy bath. Start doing all the things that radiate a smile on your face.
Love will come when you are ready for it and when it is ready for you. When it does come do not fall into the whirlpool of overthinking. I like to call this the "Dick Sand." When we meet someone we become obsessed with the idea of them. We lose ourselves by drowning in the thought of that person. Do not drown yourself. That is the worse way to die.
When your lover comes around, invite them in. Allow them to get comfortable. This does not mean you have to get comfortable. This takes time. Time is in the essence when it is ready. Instead of overthinking about this person or what will come next be grateful for the time you have had with them and be grateful for the moment you have right now.
Falling into the "Dick Sand" looks like this: You start cutting out your self-care time, you ditch your BFFs, you lose track of work/school, and the worse of all, you lose yourself in the idea of love. If you lose yourself then you cannot love that person. You will now know if they actually care or love the things about you because you do not even know you at this point.
You are probably asking yourself, "How do I not fall into the Dick Sand?" This is what you have to do.
Step 1: Do not forget that you were just fine without them.
Step 2: Keep practicing your self-care. This is a daily ritual that you cannot skip. EVER.
Step 3: Create a list of what you want out of a relationship and want you will give towards this relationship.
Step 4: Make time to really get to know your potential partner. This way you will know if they meet your loving interest.
Step 5: DO NOT cut off your social/academic life for your partner.
Step 6: Be unapologetically you. Show your lover who you really are. Do not hold back. You are too unique to shy away from your radiant personality.
Step 7: If you begin losing yourself, look back at Step 1.
Do you understand now? That you were just fine before this person came into your life and you will be just fine if they leave. Now is your time to fall. So in love with yourself that way when your special someone does come around you will know exactly what to do. Love comes when we least expect it. How fucking cliche was that? Cliche ASF. But cliches are dope so remember this one when the time comes.
You have mastered the art of not falling into the "Dick Sand." Now go lay in some real beach sand and watch the tides keep rolling towards the sand because the waves love it. Do you see how magical that is? Love. Love yourself fully and everything will fall in place exactly how it is supposed to. Trust the universe and show gratitude towards it and I promise it will not fail you.
Take a deep breath. Bloom in the art of self-love, now and you will never fall into the "Dick Sand."