I can honestly say that I didn't realize how much I apologize until my freshman year of college, when my English 101 professor told me she wouldn't answer my questions anymore if I apologized after every time I asked her something. I was completely caught off guard by this, and can honestly say that I didn't know how to respond. But as my college career went on, the more friends and family members would call me out for apologizing and I realized that my professor was totally right. I want to clarify that I wasn't being called out for apologizing when I hurt someone or did something wrong, because you should apologize when those things happen. But,I was being called out for the times I apologized over things that didn't make sense to be sorry for and if I'm being honest, I would apologize for everything. From saying I was sorry for the stutter that I've had since I was little, to apologizing when I thought I ate to much food because I didn't want to disappoint anyone. Yes I have actually done that. I finally realized that me apologizing so much meant that I was apologizing for the things that make me who I am and quite honestly, I was apologizing for my existence.
Even though I am now a senior in college and so much has changed, I still really struggle with over-apologizing. It wasn't until the last couple of days that it really hit me that this is something I still struggle with and I decided that I wanted to write this article. I have been running around like a mad woman lately, freaking out that I won't get my personal statements for grad school in on time, that I won't finish my twenty-page Shakespeare paper by the end of the semester, that I'm not studying enough for finals and of course the worry that's always on my mind, that I'm gaining weight. All of this worry has caused me so much anxiety that I've been apologizing a lot again because I'm so concerned about pleasing everyone else. I want to clearly state that apologizing too much is not healthy. It's not healthy for you, and it is certainly not healthy for your relationships. Well, I'm not sorry anymore. The truth is, I'm tired of being sorry for no reason. Deep down, I know that I have no reason to apologize over what makes me who I am because I like who I am. I'm proud of everything I've accomplished over my four years at Bradley University because I've worked really hard to get where I am now. So this realization has led me to one conclusion: I'm going to stop apologizing for things that aren't my fault and for things that make me who I am as a person.
I want to make it clear that I'm not just writing this article for myself, but for others as well. I know I am not the only person that struggles with apologizing, and my main point in writing this is to encourage others to join me in stopping apologizing when it isn't needed. Because apologizing for who you are is like walking through life in hand cuffs. You might be smiling and telling people that you are fine on the outside, but on the inside you are imprisoned by your own self judgement and the perspective that other people judge you as harshly. I can honestly tell you that you will always be your own worst critic. I know that I am my own worst critic and that in reality, nobody judges me as cruelly as I judge myself. So make the choice with me to stop apologizing because you have no reason to be sorry for who you are! You are beautiful, smart, funny, lovely and anything that makes you different is what makes you significant in this world. It's taken me twenty-one years to learn that, but it's true! So after reading this article I hope that you make the conscious decision to stop apologizing when it isn't needed. Because the moment you stop apologizing for who you are, the hand cuffs of self judgement disappear and you are finally free.





















