5 Reasons You Should Not Fear Rejection, From The Girl Who Was Afraid Of Being Rejected

5 Reasons You Should Not Fear Rejection, From The Girl Who Was Afraid Of Being Rejected

Rejection hurts. It can make us spiral into thoughts that we didn't even know existed, deep down within us. But, rejection can also be incredibly eye-opening.

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Rejection. It's just a word, yet it is rather terrifying to most people. Unwanted. Not good enough. Hopeless. Unworthy. Synonyms that echo from the simple word and cloud our minds when it comes our way.

Yet, rejection can be a good thing. Yes, you heard me right. In fact, I wouldn't be the strong person I am today if it hadn't of been for rejection. I mean think about it- could you imagine you were successful in every part of your life? What would you learn? How would you grow? Where would your strength develop?

Rejection hurts. It can make us spiral into thoughts that we didn't even know existed, deep down within us. But, rejection can also be incredibly eye-opening. It can source a strength within is. It can break boundaries and walls we unknowingly have in our bodies. It can free us and allow us to fly.

Here's why we shouldn't be afraid of rejection:

1. People who reject us have their own issues to battle

When people reject us or decide they don't want to include us in their life, there is usually insecurity that lies within them. They may be intimidated of you, or fearful that you may be a threat to their social status. They may not want to accept what you have to offer because they simply are not in the right state to do so yet. They have their own battles they are facing, and they are afraid to let you in because they aren't ready to stand up to their Goliath yet.

2. Rejection allows us to examine ourselves more closely.

The first thing that comes to my mind when I am not chosen or forgotten about is: what is wrong with me? What can I fix? What can I change? Now, I am not saying you need to change anything, or fix anything. I am simply saying that this is where we need to dig down deep inside of us and stifle those thoughts so that we can pull confidence out of us that we may not have known existed. But, we are also not perfect humans, and maybe there are a few tweaks we can make to better ourselves. It's all about looking at ourselves more closely in a truthful and positive manner.

3. Rejection helps us strive to work harder.

I don't know about you- but when I am rejected or not chosen, a small fire builds inside of me and I am motivated to prove them wrong. A rejection from one person or one company or one publisher does not mean a rejection from everyone. 100 rejections, in fact, does not mean a rejection from everyone. All you need is one acceptance. One person, job, friend, publisher, etc.. to choose you. Keep striving. Keep working. It will come!

4. Rejection humbles us.

I think everyone should experience a form of rejection because it is truly a humbling thing. It almost makes you feel so small and child-like, that it brings back a grounding and a sobering state that allows you to take a breath and truly think about everything you are working for. Although it hurts, it is a great place to be. To look in the mirror and realize that you may have some things to work on. Or you may have to find that inner strength to shut the voices of fear. Or you need to tone down your cockiness. Whatever the motive may be, rejection finds a way to bring us back to a grounded state. I think we should all experience this. It will bring you places you could never imagine.

5. Rejection helps bring a restored strength and confidence.

We have two choices. We can let rejection bring us down and keep us there, or we can build confidence and strength within us and overcome it. For so long, I've gone with choice number one. But this year, I say no. Choice number two will be the only way to respond to rejection, and I cannot wait to see where it takes me. I will not let other people's opinions of me stand in the way of my hopes and dreams or God's plan for my life. I am capable. I am strong. I am resilient. I am enough. And so are you!

Of course, rejection hurts, but just as beauty is made from ashes, so can you rise and form a beautiful success story. Nearly every successful person has a failure they dealt with in the past. Don't let yours keep you down. Take it, mold it into wings, and fly.

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Sorry I'm A Size 00

But I'm not really sorry.
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My whole life I’ve been thin—which is kind of an understatement. Every time I go to the doctor I get the same “you’re underweight” lecture that I’ve heard every year since I was able to form memories. I’ve never really felt insecure about my weight, I love being able to eat everything and not gain a single pound. Since my freshman year of high school I’ve probably only gained 8 pounds and I’m now a sophomore in college. Of course, in school, there were rumors that I was anorexic or bulimic, but everyone who knew me knew that was far from the truth. I’m now 19, 5’2, and I still have yet to break 100 pounds on the scale. It seems that there is a lot of skinny shaming going around and to me, one of the main contributors to that is the Dove Real Beauty campaign.

You’re probably wondering where I’m going with this because skinny girls get all the praise and other body types are neglected. That’s really not true, though. While loving other body types, you are tearing down skinny girls. Why is it okay to do that to skinny girls but not to other body types? Why is it okay to say “only dogs like bones” or say “every body type is beautiful” until you see a model's abs, or ribs, or thigh gap and then tear them down because they’re “unnaturally” skinny?



The point I’m trying to make is that, as a naturally skinny girl, I have never shamed anyone for their body type, yet I go every day and get at least two comments about my weight. I’m always the skinny girl, the toothpick, but I’m not Jessica. Yeah, I’m a size 00. Get over it. If you have an issue with my body and feel like my body is disgusting to you, don’t look at it. I know that I’m healthy and I don’t need your input when my body just naturally burns calories fast. I don’t have an eating disorder and never have. I am real beauty though, and I know that because I’m comfortable in my own skin. So maybe the real issue is that we as a society have been shoving certain body types down our daughters’ throats so they begin to romanticize models that have certain standards that they have to meet, who work hard for the bodies that they have, and are making a hell of a lot more money than most of the people discussing why they look emaciated while what they’re actually looking at is the photoshopped product.

I’m not going to apologize for being skinny when that is just how my body is, I can’t help it. So please, stop tearing my body down while trying to bring your body up. You can praise your body without shaming skinny girls. Shaming me for being thin does not make you better than the man that shamed your body, just as me shaming you for being curvy does not make me better than the man that shamed my body. As women, we need to love each other because we are the only ones who truly understand each other.


Cover Image Credit: Victoria's Secret Untouched

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Today Was A Bad Day, And That's OK

It's the little things that matter the most.

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Today was a bad day.

I had a nightmare last night. It was so vivid and realistic. Some nightmares I can easily forget about, but this one was difficult to push out of my mind. I woke up in cold sweats, my heart was beating fast. I genuinely felt sick to my stomach. I wish I had never dreamt what I had dreamt. The nightmare really messed me up. It was all I had thought about for most of the day.

I couldn't focus on my school work. I definitely couldn't stay focused in class. I had a pop quiz that I was not prepared for, and there was already too much built-up stress from just the past two weeks. I felt like I couldn't go on with the rest of my day. To keep it somewhat short, things just weren't going my way. I was being too hard on myself and my anxiety was through the roof.

As dramatic as it may seem, this nightmare was too personal, too scary, too heartbreaking, and not too far-fetched. Words cannot explain how dark I had felt today. It brought me to a place I thought I had moved on from.

Today was a bad day, and that's okay.

I got a call from my dad and a text from my mom, both encouraging me to move forward and not stress. There was reassurance in my dad's voice and through my mother's words. Words reassuring me they would always be there for me and loved me.

I took a trip to Gino's with my roommates. That burger was hitting, onion rings and all. These were the "perks" of my day, and though they don't seem like a lot, it meant the world to me.

It truly is the little things that can make your day. Like a call from your daddy, a text from your mama, or a trip to one of your favorite burger spots with some friends. The littlest things help you put things into perspective. These little things came to me at a point where I genuinely really needed them.

These little things distracted me from the most terrible and scarring nightmare. These little things are the things that remind me to move forward, ever stronger. These little things are the things that remind me you can turn a bad day into a good day, but only if you allow this.

Today was a bad day and there's no doubt that I will have many more. That's okay, because it's about the little things that really matter.

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