**I'm writing about this from my own personal experience. My own personal opinion. I am not going to be shaming my mom or my dad in this matter- just facts from my point of view.**

My parents told me that they were getting a divorce when I was seven years old. Of course it wasn't "Hey Cheyne, we're getting a divorce." It was more of explaining as best as they could, in nicer words since I was young and didn't really understand. Basically, it was more of a "mommy and daddy will be living at different homes from now on."

Of course at first, I'm sure I didn't really quite get what they were trying to tell me..but I don't really remember. I think at first I was okay with going to two different homes (once again, I was seven and didn't really get it). Then as I got older, I got so tired of going back and forth. Staying with my mom all week while I was going to school, and then sometimes every other weekend I'd go to my dad's house until Sunday. You can't forget the holidays- my parents would trade off holidays.

For example, my mom would have me for Thanksgiving, and my dad would have me for Easter. Sometimes, if my friends wanted me to come over, I'd have to think about who I'd be with when they wanted me to come over and hang out. Ever since I was seven, I knew I had to step up not only for my mom and be strong, but for my little brother too. I had to be the strong one- lead by example.

Divorce is an awful thing, and I don't wish that upon anyone. I don't remember a lot from my childhood before the divorce, maybe that's a good thing. However, I do believe that sometimes when you take vows in front of your loved ones, counseling and everything else isn't enough. Even after all of that, there is one good thing that has come out of my parent's divorce- I learned that I love differently because of my experience.

Meaning, that sometimes I might seem guarded because I don't want to get hurt. Or that I see things that maybe other girls don't. When I date someone, I'm in it 100 percent and put my whole heart into it, because if I am with you it means I see a future with you.

I want to someday marry you and start a family with you. I learned that sometimes two people don't always get their happy endings, but maybe with someone else. I am terrified of getting my heart broken, but who isn't? I truly believe that children with divorced parents take it seriously, maybe even too seriously. Currently, my mom is happily married and I also have another brother from that. I couldn't ask for anything better for her. However, my dad and I don't speak. Throughout the years of him being on his own he grew cold, alone, heartless. And with that I also want to make sure I don't put myself or anyone else through that.

When I get married and we have kids, you're basically stuck with me. I don't want my kids to wonder if they're going to mommy or daddy's house this weekend, or spending Christmas at mommy's house instead of everyone together for the holidays. I've seen lack of communication, abandonment (even as we prepare ourselves for the worst), and we can definitely be hard to love. I see things; meaning that I see more flaws in people because I think that maybe I try my hardest to find a "perfect person" so I can completely avoid divorce, and you can't. A child from divorce is so guarded, and I can speak for myself that I am guarded with everyone, but I am so open to giving comfort to other people because I think that maybe I didn't let people give me the comfort I needed.

For some people reading this, they may think that their parent's getting a divorce was the best thing that happened to them- which may be true. And for some of you, your parents may still be married and I applaud them for that. All I am saying is, my parent's divorce built me into the person I am.

I love differently, and I am okay with that.