I would like to believe that people are put in your life for specific reasons. Each passing stranger, friend, family, and even the toxic people who you wish you had never met. Every relationship, moment spent, or long conversation has a role in shaping the person you are and the person you will be tomorrow.
Sometimes we question the reasoning for events in our lives, most times because these events include someone doing us wrong, or a tragic thing happening to someone we love dearly. Recognizing the significance of the good along with the bad can make self-discovery a little easier.
To me, the hardest part about accepting life as it comes is that it can rip apart everything we thought we knew about someone or something. Each time you put your trust in someone, the risk of that bond breaking is very real. What hurts us the most is when that burning of a bridge becomes reality. Someone we thought we knew, someone we cared deeply for took your gift of trust and threw it out like it never meant anything to them in the first place. For people such as myself, who find being vulnerable pretty terrifying, this just creates a thicker barrier between the emotions we have and future people we could share them with.
People will break you down and they will cheat you. People will lie to you. They will tell you one thing, and take it back seemingly moments later. They will make you feel safe, then break your heart, and they will sometimes disappoint you by being the opposite of what you initially thought. BUT- they will always, always, always, make you stronger.
It takes a lot of courage to stand up for yourself, and I’ll be honest with you, I am a highly emotional person. But I would rather bottle it all up, face the world with a smile, and think of others before sharing the feelings accompanying my breaking heart. Some might say that I forgive people or am nice to people, almost to a fault.
These aspects of my personality have led me to believe I fall into the category of "pushover", therefore always letting others do as they please. Recently, however, I have come to the conclusion that this is not always the case. Forgiveness does not make you a pushover. Forgiveness can set you free. Why should I be the one reminded of pain each day I think of who has ever wronged me? If I forgive them it is no longer on my conscience, and most of the time, the person who wronged you has a hard time forgiving themselves. Though whoever may be in the wrong should feel a great deal of self disappointment, every human being deserves to live with the ability to act on a clean slate. It takes a hell of a lot more strength to forgive someone then it does to hurt someone.
So, next time you are asking the world “WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME?!?!?” try to see it as an opportunity to grow, to show love, and to forgive. The only thing holding a grudge does is take up emotional strength that could be put towards moving forward and becoming more in tune with the type of person you are or want to be.
Some days the difficulties seem too much to fathom. The good thing is, each of these events and people who contribute to our lives in various ways, are the things that push us to discover who we really are. So keep on keepin’ on, and forgive whomever is causing you pain; because sometimes that is the only thing that allows you to move on, and if the sun rises each day, so can you.
