Everybody changes. You learn, you grow, you experience new things. Everything you encounter has some effect on you. It is just how life is.
For the most part, these changes happen subtly over the course of a few years. Slow enough that you barely even notice.
But these past two years, I have changed the most. So much to the point that I sometimes feel entirely unrecognizable.
These past two years tested my limits, made me soar and sent me crashing to the ground. I cried more, laughed more and spent a lot of my days in confusion.
My heart got broken. I lost friends. Most importantly, I learned that sometimes those "that will never happen to me" situations might happen to you.
I also gained incredible friends, who have taught and inspired me more than I could have possibly imagined. They make sure I do not take life too seriously, but push me to work hard every day. They are there for everything.
I had to figure out how to let people in while also stitching up my wounds on my own. It was not easy, and I spent time questioning every move I made. But I do not regret a thing. I cannot.
I have learned too much and experienced too many important things, to look back and say "I really wish I could take that back."
Am I proud of all my decisions? No.
Did I say and do things I probably should not have? Yes.
But that is what helped me grow.
It was all worth it.
Who I am now is not afraid to make mistakes as long as I learn from them. I thought I was strong then, but I am even stronger now. I know how to listen to my heart without completely ignoring my mind.
I have learned how to let things go and not bottle up all of my emotions. To be open to new experiences and people, and make those around me feel appreciated.
With every loss, I have gained something new. I am still young. I have not figured it all out. I am still going to make stupid mistakes. And life is always going to test my limits.
And that is okay.
I am on a journey to be the best version of me possible. Whoever that may be.
Only the future knows.
