If you could, do me a favor and close your eyes. Actually, don’t do that 'cause it’ll make it hard for you to read. But still, imagine an introverted person.
Chances are you imagined a pale, bespectacled person sitting in the corner of a dimly lit coffee shop reading a giant book and drinking coffee from their own special mug (Yeah, i’m talking about you Gary), and that makes sense because that’s the image that has been beamed into our heads by every sitcom and movie over the past couple of decades. While I’m sure that there are people like that out there (still lookin' at you Gary!) this stereotype — like the majority of stereotypes — is not representative of the whole group.
Introverts get a bad rep and are often misunderstood. And along with all of the misunderstandings are a bunch of people writing things like this one or this one that spend their time trying to explain it, and this will be an abridged version of that, more or less: of course introverts can be social people. The only real difference is in how energy is lost or gained.
If that sounds complicated, I assure you that it’s not. Think about it this way: EVERYBODY has to spend time with people every now and then if they want to accomplish anything. And no matter how anti-social one can be, there comes a point at which everyone learns that they’d better learn to interact with people in a passably positive way if they want to succeed. However, these interactions with people can either take energy or give energy, depending on whether one is an introvert or extrovert, respectively.
Why is this important? Because, as somebody who is both considered a leader and pretty introverted, I want people to learn how to leave us the hell alone.
That may seem callous, but the truth is that all of us need to recharge our batteries every once in awhile. For some (extroverts), that means going out with a bunch of friends and doing an activity of some sort. And that’s fine. But for others (introverts), all we really wanna do is sit at home in our boxers and watch Luke Cage on Netflix to recharge with MAYBE one other person. And that’s okay too.
The main thing is to not try to force somebody to recharge their batteries the same way that you do, because we’re all hard-wired very differently. Also, being friends or in a relationship with someone does not mean that ALL of your interests need to intersect. In fact, many studies show that having varied interests makes a relationship — platonic or otherwise — stronger between two people. And allowing people to do their own thing every now and again is certainly a better way to show someone that you care about and accept them than saying “you need to get out more” or “stop being so anti-social.”
Again, just learn to leave us the hell alone sometimes.
Now that I’ve gotten that off of my chest, time to finish Luke Cage.
