This past week, I saw dozens of people go through the process of rushing, accepting bids, and becoming a part of various sororities and fraternities on campus. I’m incredibly happy for them – they all seem so excited to begin this new chapter of their lives with their brothers and sisters. I am proud of them and wish them the best of luck as they complete the process of crossing; however, I did not participate in the process of rushing, nor am I really interested in joining a sorority. Honor societies, yes! However, I chose not to rush for a variety of reasons.
Before I begin, I just want to say that I am in no way bashing Greek life. I definitely see why people find it appealing. Some people are interested in the charity work and philanthropic aspects Greek life has to offer, whereas others like the idea of having a group of people accept and encourage them. I know so many people who found their home by joining Greek life and that’s great for them, but knowing myself, I don’t see myself doing the same.
If I’m going to be completely honest, I’m not a huge fan of how the process of rushing and getting a bid works. I understand that sometimes when you meet someone, you have an instant connection and are able to develop a solid friendship from there; I’ve had that happen to me several times. However, I don’t see first impressions as the be all, end all to becoming friends with someone. It’s hard to judge someone based on meeting them for a short period of time, especially when you consider the fact that this person is nervous, exhausted from meeting with several different sororities or fraternities, and just wants to be accepted for who they are. In that vein, I don’t like the idea of turning someone away because they don’t “fit in”. I’ve never rushed or been a part of Greek life, so I realize I don’t completely understand it, but the idea of being excluded and turned away because I have no place in a certain group, despite them not knowing much about me beyond my surface presentation, is something I am uncomfortable with.
Another reason why I chose not to rush is that I feel like Greek life is a huge commitment and without fully knowing what I’m getting myself into, I’m not sure if I can confidently say “yes” to a bid. I don’t know what these girls are like – for all I know, I may not get along with them, I may have a nasty fall out with my big, little, or twin – it’s unpredictable. We can’t always predict if we’ll be happy in a certain group or organization, but the problem with Greek life is that it’s extremely hard to quit without being shunned and ostracized by your former brothers or sisters. I’ve seen it happen and I can get both sides; what I’m saying is that I don’t want to risk not being able to stay in a sorority and then have people harbor negative feelings towards me as a result. Greek life is without a doubt time consuming and between work, school, maintaining relationships, extra curricular activities, commuting to college, and wanting to have personal time, I’m just not sure I would have time for all of it and do not want to risk damaging my relationships with my sisters for not being able to give my 110% to my sorority.
There are aspects of Greek life that I find appealing, such as having strong bonds with other girls that uplift you and the charity work and fundraising that comes with being Greek. Personally, I’ve had opportunities to develop strong, positive friendships and do service without being in a sorority. I absolutely understand the benefits of Greek life and I will never stereotype and make nasty assumptions about them (i.e. I won’t say that people in Greek life pay for friends or accuse them of doing nothing but party all the time, because I know that’s not true). The same way that it’s a personal choice to rush, it’s my personal choice to not rush and to not be a part of Greek life.
