Being in college we tend to experience a lot of things that we never think we will, even if it's vicariously through our friends. Our parents, professors, school counselors, heck even Law & Order SVU try to prepare us for them, but in the real world there's never enough preparation for the unexpected.

I'm writing this article because recently I have been hearing too many stories from my own friends of the horrors from dealing with the aftermath of situations while being inebriated and having been taken advantage of. It seems like we forget that you still need to ask for permission, and that saying "yes" while intoxicated is not consent. Cases like People v. Turner that made headlines earlier this year, where a Stanford student raped a peer, remind us that the rape culture in college is still a serious threat to our campus safety. Freshman at my university are all required to attend a forum hosted by the Date Safe Project, where we talk about the importance of asking for permission and giving verbal consent before making a move on someone and preventing it from happening likewise. We tend to think these discussions are silly and unnecessary and forget about them soon after, but they're important not only for our well-being, but for our friends as well. We think that just because the hottest person on campus is going after us for the night at a party that it's okay for them to force themselves onto us without our permission. This couldn't be anymore inaccurate for both parties. Being attractive and knowing it doesn't give you permission to go after whoever you want and make them do things you know they could potentially be uncomfortable with. "It is estimated that the percentage of completed or attempted rape victimization among women in higher educational institutions may be between 20% and 25% over the course of a college career." Think of this in terms of 4 years, and in the sense of quarters. Which makes these statistics scarcely high and terrifying. "Among college women, 9 in 10 victims of rape and sexual assault knew their offender" the National Sexual Violence Research Center reported.

I think part of the problem lies within not knowing the difference. We think that just because someone paid for dinner or a date that we are obligated to sleep with them, or return the favor sexually. Or that if we're kissing someone and it starts to get heated and turn into something more that "we asked for it" without meaning to. We need to stop assuming these things and thinking relationships are solely based on sex. You should never feel obligated to do anything that makes you uncomfortable. Apps like "Circle of 6", where you pick a circle of 6 trusted friends and/or family members, make it easy to send an emergency text with a couple of taps and have them call you to get you out of an confining situation.

Just remember, "did you ask" before making a move on someone? It shouldn't be uncomfortable to feel comfortable.