You are sitting in a dark room, with no doors, and the only piece of light you see is streaming through a window that seems to keep getting more and more out of reach. All of a sudden the walls seem to start closing in and your mind feels like it is literally going to blow up. If you are someone with anxiety and depression, you know exactly how this feels and what I am talking about, and I am here to tell you that I get it.
Anxiety is something I have always struggled with. Usually it just comes and goes at certain times, but over the course of the past few years it has gradually gotten worse and especially worse in the past few months, to the point where I have just recently been medically diagnosed and treated for anxiety, and also depression. Before now, it has never been something that I was proud of and definitely not something that I told many people about because I was scared of what their reaction might be. I was worried that my friends may not look at me the same, people would think that I am mentally insane, and God was disappointed in me. There have been certain days where I would just lie on my bathroom floor and cry my eyes out because I felt like I could not go on with life if I was going to continue feeling this way. I felt like no matter who I talked to or what I would say to them, nobody could really understand what was happening in my mind and nothing they did could help me feel better.
Last week, I attended a church conference with my youth group called CIY Move. One night, they put up an SOS button for people to come and press on to signify that they needed to be rescued. The moment that worship started and we had the chance to press the button, I knew I was being called for rescue. The feeling I got after I pressed on that little button and made it beep was incredible. God was screaming in my ear telling me that He hears my cries and has me in the palms of His hands. I am telling you the same thing.
You may be going through the exact same thing right now. You may be having restless nights, and waking up the next morning feeling like you have gotten run over by a train. You feel like nobody really understands what you are going through, and even though they say everything is going to be okay, you don't believe them. Hebrews 6:19 says "We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure." I'm not saying that life is going to get easier, and you will never be sad or anxious again, because I know myself that there is a long road ahead. But truth be told, it will get better. God knows your struggle, and He is waiting for you to fall to His feet and beg for His arms to be wrapped tight around you. There are people in your life who love you and want to be there to talk to you and help you when you feel like you cannot go on. My prayer is that you cling to the hope that God has for you, and be reminded that there is light at the end of the tunnel. You are not forsaken. You have hope. You can be rescued.
"Now then stand still and see this great thing the Lord is about to do before your eyes." - 1 Samuel 12:16
