I’m getting to the point in my life- miscellaneous papers, money, in need of a job, undying stress- where I’m trying to figure myself out. When you reach the age of 20 you’ve been alive for two decades. If you put it in perspective, you have been on this earth for a good time now. You start to get ansty with the idea that you need to accomplish things and venture out, taking on the world. But when you reach 21 you are an adult. You are on your own per say which is exciting, but equally just as nerve wrecking. A subtle pressure begins to weigh down on your shoulders that dramatically increases as you make your way through your early 20’s. You want to impress everyone. You want your family to tell their friends during their luncheons and garden club meetings how accomplished their child is and what they are achieving. I am two weeks away from turning 21 and I can tell you honestly, regarding my future I have no idea where I am going to end up, and that’s ok.

Life isn’t going to end up how you thought it was in 2^nd grade when your sweet curly haired teacher asked you what you wanted to be when you grew up. You stood up in class and proudly said I want to be a veterinarian or a doctor or a magician. You said it with such confidence, your hands on your hip like Peter Pan. I can’t remember what I said in 2^nd grade, but I know now most likely what I wanted to be then has changed to something completely different now. The only thing that shouldn’t change should be your drive and love to do something. Even if you are not sure what you want to do in life you know what you like to do. We all have goals, and I think that is the most important thing a young adult at my age should have. Goals tied with determination is what will get you places in life. I know that can sound terrifying, especially if you are not ready for the real world. You will face many challenges as you enter your 20’s. But it is the challenges and how you face them that will help define your future.

The hardest thing these days undeniably is the omnipotence of social media. Don’t get me wrong social media is a great thing. It has opened a gateway for many jobs and platforms for people to express and advertise their art on, but it also creates competition. On Instagram and Facebook people love to share to the world what they have done and accomplished. This can be hard when someone who is just making their way in the world has to see older high school alums getting their doctorate in medicine, friends getting internships at prestigious magazines, and even the celebrities who are only a few years older than you making millions by posing in a magazine, posting something on their Instagram, or promoting a new makeup line. Your start to feel fuzzy in your head as your eyes are glued fixed on the scrolling of images on your Insta feed. You think to yourself-sitting on the floor of your bed room- what am I going to do in life. If this has been you, do not worry you are not alone! I have always told myself not to compare myself to others, and I am a total hypocrite when saying this because I do it all the time. It is something I am trying to stop doing.

I try to compare myself to who I was yesterday.

That’s hard too because everyone has bad days. Some days you’ll wake up to birds chirping, the sun flowing ethereally into the room as you sit up glowing, ready for your day. But then there are the days you wake up to the sound of your insidious alarm blaring off, your hair is knotted on top of your head and you feel like a zombie. Going on Instagram scrolling through photos of beautiful models in Paris, journalists traveling the world, and bloggers documenting savory pics of delicious foods, you feel unaccomplished. Instead you should use this to motivate you!

One of the biggest questions I have always been trying to answer is “What defines me?” And this is relevant to everything I have mentioned before. When on Instagram and you see a post of a beautiful brunette who is painting a graphic design for a company, you define that person as an artistic creative human being you has great style and obviously loves art. It is such a satisfying and whole feeling to have someone think of you in a particular way. She is an artist, not a politician. That is how you see her and what you see her as not. I don’t necessarily want to categorize myself or anyone if that’s the idea you are getting. What I’m trying to say is, you want people to see you in a certain way. But what people forget is that people like her and bloggers, models, editors, doctors, nurses, architects, everyone, none of us are perfect. Everyone has a weird quirk, a fault, something that makes them different from anyone else in the world. Embrace that difference. Show it to the world. Dare to be different. You don't have to be like those vloggers or celebrities, create the new new. So now I ask you, what defines you? Who are you? No one else is you! So be you!