Risks. An essential part of decision-making that prevents humans from doing things that they probably shouldn’t, like the risk of getting arrested prevents the robbing of a bank (typically). However, the fear of risks can also stop us from pursuing opportunities that further our own personal development. That fear also causes us to miss out on memorable moments that we will never get back. When I came to that realization, nothing terrified me more than the thought of allowing other experiences to pass me by. So I’ve decided to live without regrets.
Recently, I’ve come to believe that everything happens for a reason. I know that it’s definitely a cliché to say that, but I’ve realized that it’s the truth. Last semester, sitting in the library, I decided to take a break from my reading. My brain took this as an opportunity to reflect on what I viewed as the worst moments of my past. I was suddenly surrounded by feelings of embarrassment, sadness, and anger -- remembering stupid things I said to crushes when I was shaking from head to toe, the time that my best friend told me that she didn’t want to be around me anymore, or the fight I had with my sister a year ago about something that seems so immature now. I was overwhelmed with regret. Why did I let myself trust someone who ended up breaking my heart? When did I stop being so close with my siblings? How could I have allowed myself to do these horrible things, and why was I now being forced to remember them in such excruciating detail?
But, then, I stopped. I forced myself to stop thinking about what had already happened, and, instead, focus on what I was living right now. I thought about how I am going to school at an amazing college, have already made wonderful friends, and also how I am now able to pursue one of my passions that had fallen to the wayside recently: writing. I realized that if I had let risk take over my decision making, I never would be where I am today. I wouldn’t have applied for the Odyssey out of fear that I wouldn’t be hired. I wouldn’t have added my double major because most people think that majoring in theatre is like majoring in luck, and I wouldn’t have rushed a sorority because there’s a possibility that the end result won’t be perfect.
But most importantly, when I did take time to reflect on my past again, I made myself view it the way it is meant to be viewed: what I personally took away from all of those seemingly awful experiences. If I hadn’t had my heart broken, I never would’ve learned that I deserve better. If I hadn’t completely embarrassed myself in any way possible, I never would’ve learned that it’s OK to laugh at yourself.
So even though it may not seem like anything good can come from your significant other breaking up with you, when you’re happier than you’ve ever been with your new partner, you’ll have your past experiences to thank. Or when you fail a test, and then you ace your next test because you realized that you needed to study more, suddenly, everything will just click.
Then, you’ll realize that living in fear of risks isn’t the way to live at all. I certainly have. I rarely ever take the time to convince myself out of doing something that I really feel like I need to do (unless it’s binge-watching "Friends" on Netflix at 2 a.m. when I have an 8:30 class the next morning that I usually try to talk myself out of). Of course, I still do embarrassing things, and it’s impossible to not feel some sort of regret after doing something stupid, or when something doesn’t turn out the way you expected. But if you make the time to reflect and learn, you may begin to realize that you are, in fact, living a life without regrets.
