This week I am back at it again, typing away a meaningful article, from the somewhat-comfort of the first floor of UAB’s library. As a yearning soul that is effortlessly awaiting confirmation of acceptance, I would like to invite you to dive into the troubles that are the fears of judgement. I must say, because I am 19 years old, I should feel comfortable inside my own skin, therefore, I shouldn’t care what other students in the first floor of this library think of me. However, I kind of do.
When I walked into the library 27 minutes ago, I cautiously entered, searching for people I may know. Yes, my hair is wet from my shower and I threw on whatever clothes looked the comfiest. So, naturally I would be a little anxious for others to see me this way. After choosing a study area, I realized that my station’s computer is actually facing a walkway, so anybody who cares enough to see what I’m writing can actually see me in action. Yikes. I hate when people read my unfinished work. I do have Pandora internet radio on, playing a mixture of classical music, christmas music, and miscellaneous Disney songs. Thankfully nobody can see my cool jams on the computer screen.
The silly thing about all of this is that I have finals that I should be studying for, not worrying about what other people think of my choice of words or if a song really is a jam. I don’t have anything to hide and I don’t have anything to be ashamed of-- so why do I act this way?
These thoughts may be a mode of distraction I created so I can procrastinate studying. But, honestly, I don’t care if the world loves Drake and Kendrick Lamar. I love Phil Collins. I love Tarzan. I will proudly sing “old” songs like Hey Ya! by Outkast in my car with every window down. And the best part about it is that nobody can stop me.
Just like nobody can stop me from making all A’s on my exams this week. Just like nobody can stop me from getting into nursing school, becoming a registered nurse, getting married, having children, owning a house, and living the life that I have been blessed to live. I shouldn’t be judged for what I like and I shouldn’t have to worry because I was made to do the things I gravitate towards. Why waste time doing things you don’t like? Life would be pretty boring.
So to the students that are creeping behind me while I type this: first of all, you should be spending your time doing something else like studying for your own finals, but second, let me write what I want to write and respect how I do so. Respect my presence and respect yours.
