Dear Teenage Girl, Learn To Love The Person In The Mirror

Dear Teenage Girl, Learn To Love The Person In The Mirror

Stop being your own worst enemy.

You yearned for your thirteenth birthday. On that day, you could finally announce to the world that you are officially a teenager. What exactly is the draw of being a teenager? Maybe it's the idea of more independence and adventure. Maybe it's the hope of going on a first date and getting that first kiss. Despite all of these exciting prospects, however, you quickly realized that the reality of being a teenager doesn't quite match the dream you had of it.

You never prepared yourself for the first time someone called you ugly -- and actually meant it. You never would have guessed that one day you would look in the mirror and hate what you saw. You never expected that you could feel so alone and misunderstood. The fact is, the best parts of being a teenager are often hidden beneath all of the uncertainty and insecurity. In all likelihood, the mirror has become your enemy and an ally to that voice inside your head that is always tearing you down. But here's the thing: You can and should learn to love the person staring back at you in the mirror because that person is beautiful and completely unique. It's not as difficult as it may seem.

Take control over that voice in your head. They're your own thoughts and you can change them for better or for worse. When you look in the mirror, force that voice to say something positive rather than something negative. You can see all your flaws staring you in the face because you know yourself better than anyone else. Practice looking at yourself the way others see you, and that voice will almost certainly find something good to say about you. In the same way you see everything that's good about other people, so do other people see you.

Believe people when they call you pretty. I understand how hard it is to listen when people call you pretty, I do. You automatically assume they are lying to try and make you feel better or to flatter you. Stop doing that. People tell you that you look pretty because you do. The fact that you think of yourself as ugly has no bearing on how other people perceive you. Learn to take compliments, especially from the people that know you and love you. They are sincere.

Understand the mean girl's motive. I know that there is that one girl, maybe several girls, in your life who takes every chance she can to make you feel bad about yourself. Perhaps she is subtle about it, making snide comments about something you're wearing or how you did your hair. Perhaps she talks about you behind your back to other girls and you overhear it. Whichever way she mounts her attacks, just know this: That girl struggles with the same feelings you do. Anyone who feels the need to constantly bash others cannot possibly have a good self-image. You might have much more in common with that mean girl than you think.

Most importantly, listen when people tell you that what's on the inside counts the most. You've heard people say this over and over again. You are sick and tired of being told that having a good personality trumps having good looks. But I'm here to tell you that it is 100 percent true. As I've grown older, I've come to realize that I value kindness much more than "beauty." I think my friends are absolutely gorgeous, of course, but that's not the reason I like them at all. Who cares if someone looks fabulous if they act awfully? You should be striving to make that person in the mirror someone who will bring joy to people.

Learning to love the person you see in the mirror is a struggle that every teenage girl experiences. But if you know what is most important in life, then that lesson is an easier one to learn. Understand that being considered pretty is not what life is about. If you make life about having good looks, you won't live a happy or satisfied life. Instead, be a true friend to the people who need it most and focus on all of the people in your life who care about you. They care about you because you are who you are, and they would hate it if you changed. When you look in the mirror, smile, because the person there is more than a beautiful face. Smile because the person there is a beautiful person.

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5 Perks Of Having A Long-Distance Best Friend

The best kind of long-distance relationship.

Sometimes, people get annoyed when girls refer to multiple people as their "best friend," but they don't understand. We have different types of best friends. There's the going out together best friend, the see each other everyday best friend and the constant, low maintenance best friend.

While I'm lucky enough to have two out of the three at the same school as me, my "low maintenance" best friend goes to college six hours from Baton Rouge.

This type of friend is special because no matter how long you go without talking or seeing each other, you're always insanely close. Even though I miss her daily, having a long-distance best friend has its perks. Here are just a few of them...

1. Getting to see each other is a special event.

Sometimes when you see someone all the time, you take that person and their friendship for granted. When you don't get to see one of your favorite people very often, the times when you're together are truly appreciated.

2. You always have someone to give unbiased advice.

This person knows you best, but they probably don't know the people you're telling them about, so they can give you better advice than anyone else.

3. You always have someone to text and FaceTime.

While there may be hundreds of miles between you, they're also just a phone call away. You know they'll always be there for you even when they can't physically be there.

4. You can plan fun trips to visit each other.

When you can visit each other, you get to meet the people you've heard so much about and experience all the places they love. You get to have your own college experience and, sometimes, theirs, too.

5. You know they will always be a part of your life.

If you can survive going to school in different states, you've both proven that your friendship will last forever. You both care enough to make time for the other in the midst of exams, social events, and homework.

The long-distance best friend is a forever friend. While I wish I could see mine more, I wouldn't trade her for anything.

Cover Image Credit: Just For Laughs-Chicago

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Poetry On Odyssey: Some Days

A poem that reminds you that you're not alone.


Some days,

You dread the sound of your alarm. You snooze and snooze and snooze and snooze.

When you finally pull yourself out of bed, pressed time forces you to throw on stained sweats

you find yourself chugging a cup of coffee.

You sit on the couch and contemplate calling out of work

You caught the stomach bug,

Or perhaps the flu,

Maybe you broke your collar bone

Or need a new phone

The endless list of excuses repeats through your head as you sit on the couch, wishing you were still in bed.

It takes every ounce

Every breath

Every fiber of your being to pull yourself off the couch

And into the car

And into the building where you work

Some days,

This is just how it goes

You are not alone.

Some days,

You awake to the beautiful sound of birds

Chirping outside your window

The sun sneaks its way into your room

A smile creeps across your face as you realize you are awake to see a new day

You make a good breakfast

You read a few pages of your favorite book

You get your mind ready for the things it will accomplish today

Before you know it you've worked an entire day

Your job is done

As you pull into your driveway,

you take a few breaths

Feeling grateful for another meaningful day.

Some days,

This is how it goes

You are not alone.

Every day is a gamble,

Every day is a gift

The key to getting more good days

Is believing that everyday is one.

You are not alone, this is just how it goes.

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