Dear Straight Girls,

Hey. We love you guys a lot. With that being said, we also sort of get irritated with you guys sometimes. Here's the deal with that:

We aren't flirting with you, straight girls. A lesbians WORST nightmare is typically to fall in love with a straight girl. The only thing is ever leads to is heartbreak and we really don't want to hurt. You guys are the greatest, but you have so much to learn. We are all women trying to make our way through the world, and there's no reason for you to believe we want anything from you other than friendship and comraderie.

We aren't gross. We aren't angry or after your children or YOU even. The stereotypes are a lie. Except the whole flannel thing because that's true as fuck. I can't even count how many I have.

Another thing? Take same sex relationships as seriously as straight one. We are all women who have experienced love, and just want to be happy for the rest of our lives with the person we love the very most - male or female, gay or straight, or otherwise. Love is love, and heartbreak is heartbreak regardless of who you are.

We all put our bras on the same way. To quote Tina Belcher, "one boob at a time." Try to understand. Don't assume that we like to be treated like a male friend. As your lesbian friend, I promise to always sit with you watching The Notebook with pints of ice cream when a man hurts you. I won't expect you to do it for me - I don't live with expectations like that. However, it would be nice. After all, my relationship has twice the amount of menstrual periods of a straight one.

Hope to see you sometime. Whether its a heartbreak or job promotion or even just for the hell of itm.. don't forget the rocky road.

Love,

Your lesbian friend.