Dear Netflix,
It has come to my attention lately that you have been feeling a little abused. The world-wide phenomenon "Netflix and Chill" has demoted you. You feel as though people are using you as a means to an end. Everyone's focus is on the "chill" and you get ignored while the "chilling" commences. Have no fear my dear friend, for I am here to reassure you that there are loyal friends such as myself who appreciate you for who you are and want to thank you for your services.
Thank you Netflix for always keeping me company. Whether it's one hour or ten, you are always up for spending time together. There's no one else I'd rather share my bed with. I can't count all the nights I fell asleep next to you. You are a constant in my life that I fear I cannot function without. Others may judge our relationship saying that we spend an unhealthy amount time together. But I know for a fact, I have never been in a more stable relationship.
I know we have had some rough times when you removed some of my favorite shows. You led me on for months only to selfishly take away a show I had become emotionally invested in. It doesn't matter if the series ended. Alas, you did make up for it in the endless updates of new seasons, shows, and movies. I truly appreciated your personalized emails letting me know that my favorites are ready for me to watch them. Even if these emails arrive while I'm cramming for an exam.
Thank you for understanding that characters in a show are not just fictitious. I am most certainly in a relationship with several men you've set me up with. Whether they be a cop, doctor, or vampire you never judged. And when those relationships ended, you stuck by me, so I could get the closure I needed to move on.
I love how you are available night and day to help me procrastinate. I would be an overly productive person if I did not have you in my life. You help me fill the endless hours I could be stuck doing something productive. In bed, at school, in the waiting room of the doctors office, on a plane, on the couch, in the library, at work - no matter where we are, we find time to waste time together.
Most importantly, thank you for being the ultimate excuse to not socialize with other human beings. I thank you for understanding that even though I think I'm going out on a Saturday night, I will really end up spending some quality time with you.
So next time someone uses you as an excuse to "chill" with their latest infatuation, know that I am here for you.
Love,
Shannon
