Dear, Heart of Mine
I started off college with you in a cage. I thought that was the way to keep you safe. I’d check the lock three times a day to make sure no one could get inside to you. I brought you food and water so that you were staying nice and healthy. I never let anything that I thought could harm you near. You were already so scarred, I didn’t want to take a chance of adding more.
Little did I know that this was hurting you even more. You would try to grow, but the bars were too small. So, they would crush you. The food and water wasn’t enough. You needed sunlight and fresh air. And while I was holding you in the cage I built to protect you from people that could hurt you, you weren’t available to those that could heal you.
So, when Love came along, charming and beautiful as ever, I thought it would be a good time to let you out. You were so happy. Happier than you’d ever been before. When Love would kiss you, you’d leap for joy. When Love would hug you, you felt warm. When Love laid by your side while you slept, you felt complete.
However, Love was blinding you, so that you couldn’t see all of the things going wrong. The way Love may have said the right things that made you flutter, it also said that things that hurt you and dug into your scars. Love made you laugh, but it also made you cry. Love made you feel alive, but it also made you feel worthless.
You decided to let Love go because you feel like you aren’t good enough for Love. Love had been making big plans, and you didn’t want to hold it back. Then, you just find out that it’s what Love wanted all along. For you to let it go, that is. It wanted you to step out of the way “temporarily”.
But, now you see. It’s probably not temporarily. You see that this whole time you were feeling Love, you weren’t receiving desire. You weren’t feeling wanted. And it’s no fault Love’s own. It just wasn’t the right love for you. And it never will be.
Part of you still hopes that Love will change and mend what’s been broken. But, you know it’s probably not going to happen. You have to fix what is broken. Better yet, I have to. You’re my heart. I am the only one that can fix you. Because I am the only one that knows you.
We’ve been through a lot together. The death of loved ones, the loss of friendships, the ends of relationships, family members betraying you. And now, the first time you’ve been in love being ripped from you. There are countless other things, but through them all we remained standing. We may have stumbled or even fallen sometimes, but we always got back up.
And don’t worry, I’m not putting you back in the cage. I’m not even sure if I own it anymore. You are going to you back where you belong and I will treat you the way you need to be treated while we recover. And when someone comes along that wants you, I’ll make sure that they are worth it before I hand you off. You’re valuable to me. I’m not going to let anyone hurt you again.
Sincerely,
The One That Holds You.
