Dear old friend,
I'm not the super serious type, never ever was. In fact, 99% of the time I'm giddy while chugging along through this lovely life. You should know this.
You see, you should also know that I feel strongly. Fully. I let life bring me to important places and people. Equally, I let life bring them to me. If they don't seem right, I remove myself as early as possible. Move on. Keep chugging.
I tend to consider these situations of removal "growing apart" or "going separate ways" because that's usually at least part of it.
I'm stubborn as hell. So are you. So are most people. The important part is being able to admit this. I'm willing to say sorry when I see that I'm in the wrong (after the cool-down, of course). I don't throw the damn word around unless I feel it. By no means do I say it just so people aren't mad at me. This would be a major contribution to the dilution of this important word. And not to mention: being a jerk and deciding to say sorry so that "others don't hate you" is just ineffective and cowardly.
First, own your actions. Second, don't just say sorry. Feel sorry. Show sorry. Otherwise, keep it locked away.
I move on hard, yet somehow old friendships seem to sneak back here and there as if to say "Remember me?" Few of them are brief, refreshing trips down memory lane. Others remind me of why I moved on so quickly.
Either way, one thing seems to be constant. I've learned more about you, old friend, than I knew while we were conquering the world together. I've learned more about you in one second of being "old friends" than I did during years of being friends.
Don't take this personally, old friend. I'm a closure person. If I don't receive it from others, then I create it for myself. You can't trap me. This isn't a game.
This is more a favor for you than it is for me: Don't treat people like they're nothing then act indirect and hopeful. Don't act tough while by their side then retreat while on the opposition. Don't unfollow them then follow them again. Don't be lukewarm. Don't be grey. If they're unimportant to you, own that as much as anything.
You were so special to me. So important.
But I move on. I chug.
My wish for you is that you chug too. This letter to you, old friend, honors that. Stop reappearing without good cause. Otherwise, you give me a reason to suspect that I'm still important to you in some way.
And if you're reading this, old friend, then you and I both know I am.
Sincerely,
Yours truly.
xx.
-S
