To all the cat callers out there, I would like to say thank you.
Thank you for helping me and millions of other women not feel comfortable walking down the street. Thank you for making us feel self-conscious about our body image. Thank you for continuing to oppress us on a regular basis.
If you haven’t realized it yet, I’m being sarcastic. I don’t understand why some men do it. What is the point of shouting vulgar obscenities at a woman? Do you think it’s a compliment? Do you even know what a compliment is? According to the Webster Dictionary, a compliment is a polite expression of praise or admiration. I bet you’re confused, so let me give you an example. Compliments are things like “Nice smile,” “Pretty Dress,” and so forth. Sayings things like, “That booty is poking in them jeans” and “The things I would do to you...” are not compliments.
Compliments are personalized and catered to an individual, while catcalling is hyper-sexualized. I bet you thought that a wolf whistle was the equivalent to “Hello, how are you doing?” I’m sorry to break it to you that it is not. Neither is shouting out obscenities from your vehicle at a stop light. Neither is getting mad and insulting her when a woman doesn’t respond or responds negatively.
No girl is going to be whistled at and then think to herself “That was so romantic, maybe he is the man I am meant to marry.” If you think that’s how it works, you are delusional. What do you get out of it? Didn’t your mothers ever teach you the right way to get a lady's attention? No, of course not. In today’s society, we focus solely on helping girls avoid being the victim; we tell them to keep walking, ignore rude comments, walk with a buddy, etc. We tell them silence is the best self-defense.We don’t tell you boys anything. So boys, open up your ears while I sprout some knowledge on you.
Women are people too. Shocker, I know. The common denominator in most catcalling situations is control.
Most men have this sense of entitlement and feel like they can do whatever they want. I once asked a friend why he called out to a girl that walked past us in the cafeteria, and his response was “Why not?” Most males assume they have the right to do things like that. Why? Because they are never challenged when they engage in these behaviors. People brush the behaviors aside, using the age old cop-out: “Boys will be boys."
So boys, no, MEN, here is the bottom line. If something is coming out of your mouth that could offend or make a woman feel uncomfortable, even in the slightest way, then don’t say it. At the end of the day, you can either treat a woman like an actual person, or like a piece of meat. The choice is yours.
All I ask is that you imagine that you had a daughter and she was catcalled, and how that would make you feel.
