Dear my future daughter,
I am writing this letter to you with expectations that I will be meeting you in the next eight to ten years. I am currently nineteen and as bad as I cannot wait to finish college, become a ten years older, hurry up and get married, have a huge house, and meet you soon after your father and I are financially stable enough to have you, this is not possible.
I can wait for the love I deserve and have wanted to have. I can wait for you. You are love.
I do not know you yet, but I do know that when we eventually meet, I will fall in love with you. I will fall in love with your sweet nature and the stubbornness and determination that you get from me. I will fall in love with your smile. I will love you if you are outspoken, quiet, loud, goofy, imaginative. I will love you because just like David in the Bible said in Psalms 139:14, you are "fearfully and wonderfully made."
In this world full of hatred and bitterness, I want you to love Jesus, and at the same time, I want you to love yourself. I can only do so much loving you as your mother, but you are your main priority.
I want you to love your name whether that be Harmony, Audrey, Mackenzie, or Aniyah. You are getting my middle name as well. When you say your name out loud to that person who mispronounces it, I want you to have the confidence that I did not have when my name was once mispronounced.
I want you to love and embrace your curly hair even if society says that it is unruly and looks bad. I have a joke with my mother, that the word "relaxer" is going to be a bad word in our house. If you even mention it or say that you want one, I will sit down with you and I will go over the one million and one reasons why I love your hair. You are a queen crowned in your curls and if anyone tells you otherwise, remember what I'm telling you.
I want you to embrace your dark mocha skin that others try to call ugly. While you are outside with your beautiful melanin glow, there will be other people outside trying to become a color closer to yours. Should I even go into the topic of skin bleaching? Chemically lightening your skin is not healthy and it will burn your beautiful skin off.
My daughter, I want you to be unapologetically black. If you enjoy riding horses like I do, then go ahead and ride horses. If your passion is dance like mine is, go ahead and do it. If you feel like you are black whether you listen to a white singer or even if you listen to a black singer.
Be that carefree black girl. Fall in love with yourself. It's okay to feel flawless and scream "I woke up like this!" out loud on the days when you don't feel beautiful. You are beautiful and you are loved. I want you to remember this fact every time you look in the mirror.
Along with being yourself and carefree, I want you to learn to have empathy for people who are hurting and understand where they are coming from.
I'm asking you to not be like me and be stubborn when it comes to falling in love. It is fine to fall in love and get your heart broken but if that boy breaks your heart to the point where you don't know if you will be okay, I want you to come to me immediately. I've been through that before and I do not want you to feel like you are alone when you grieve over the boy who left you broken. Broken hearts lead to you breaking hearts and that is not a good thing. Do not do what I did and lead a person on who meant the world to you and then leave them stranded and do it over and over again.
My daughter, I want you to be honest with your feelings and when you find that person that you trust with all of your heart, for example me (I've been where you're at), or a close friend tell them everything. Tell them your goals, tell them your dreams, tell them why you're so afraid to fall in love, most of all tell them the truth. My darling daughter, be true to yourself and who you are and I promise you will love and be loved.
Love,
Your Future Mother.
