Words cannot express how strong our love/hate relationship is. I hate you for the way you make me feel when I wake up with a hangover. I love having a glass of you in my hand on a chilly wintery night. I hate the way you make me word vomit all the thoughts I want to keep inside my head. I love having a bottle of you on a sweltering summer day. I hate the way you make me spend so much money. I love the way you give me liquid courage sometimes. I hate the way you make everyone so emotional. I love how you are always there to celebrate the big moments. I hate that you’re the reason I have most of my lowest moments. I love the way you come in different flavors and forms, always accessible to cater to my every mood. I hate when you make me forget things. I love that you are a way to bring people together. I hate that you make me become best friends some mornings with the porcelain bowl.
What I hate the most, though, are the people you take away from my life.
I know I have told you many times that I will quit you, but I just can’t seem to resist. Remember high school prom or freshman year initiation? How about just last night? Those were some dark times in our relationship but we’ve preserved nevertheless. Much to my reluctance and my vow to abstain, you always creep back into my life with a cold bottle of Pinot Grigio or a Bud Light Lime greeting me like an old friend.
I wonder if you realize though how much pain, fear, joy, elation, and illness you cause. I wonder if you know how much power you possess. To some, you a merely a sign of a good time. Take college students for example. They drink out of your keg every weekend night just looking to enjoy some quality time with friends. Or even the young professionals that drink from your tap at the local bar in the city. They are simply there to mingle, flirt, and drink. No harm, no foul. You can be seen on the beach in forms of fruity drinks and bottled beer or in glasses at every restaurant.
You mean well, I get that. Your intentions are not to cause harm, destruction, or emotional turmoil. Though those are not your intentions they are the repercussions of someone who doesn’t know how to handle their alcohol. You have taken countless undeserving lives whether it is through suicide or a drunk driving accident. You have caused irreparable pain for families who already have enough on their plate. To some, you are the devil. You are the crippling thing in their life that they can’t live without. You are their crutch that they use to dull the pain. Alcoholism is an illness that you cause. You change people and make them no longer themselves. You are a burden to some, a relief to others, and catalyst of some sort to most. You ruin lives but you are not solely to blame and I acknowledge that. I also know that there is nothing you can really do about these problems.
A person orders the drink, a person drinks the drink, and a person continues to order more and more. We are part of the problem that causes you to get your bad rep. Teenagers, college students, adults, etc. need to take responsibility. Whether your 15, 21, 49, 77 you are not immune to the power that alcohol possesses. We need to learn how to handle our alcohol. We are the drivers behind the wheel. We are the ones that know our limits. We are the ones that determine what goes into our body. Yes, we blame alcohol for our problems but we carry just as much of the blame.
Alcohol, you have been there for birthday parties, graduations, first dates, weddings, funerals, and more. You have also been the reason people have missed out on these endeavors. Whether it is due to a death or because someone was too drunk to attend there are things that you ruin.
My hope is that people will use alcohol for the right reasons. My hope is that drunk driving accidents won’t be a thing that we always see on the news. My hope is that you will be drunk for a good time not to dull the bad times.
Someone who loves/hates you