Dealing with People who Don't Listen

I know You're Not Listening to Me

How to Deal with the Person Who Doesn't Listen to a Word you Say

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We all have that person in our lives who just isn't listening to a word we're saying. Maybe they ask you questions just to turn back the conversation to their answer. Perhaps, they're nodding their head and trying to talk every time you take a breath. They might not even ask your opinion on anything, forcing you to just sit and listen to them. Unfortunately, you might have to see this person often.

I have someone in my life who asks me questions to make themselves feel good. I always imagine them checking my name off their "interaction list". By now, I know they're not listening to anything I'm saying because they ask me the same question over and over again, never knowing what my answer will be.

This used to frustrate the heck out of me. It made me feel unimportant and disregarded. Recently, I have accepted that their lack of interest in me is not my problem. I don't have to feel less about myself just because someone doesn't want to take the time to actually get to know me. I have been working really hard to understand how to interact with this person, and others like them, in a way where I am not about to pull my hair out.

These are practices that have been helping me deal with this situation:

1. Recognize that they're not inquiring for you. They're inquiring for themselves. I don't feel like It's any skin off of my back to entertain them for a few minutes. So answer the question. Then, answer it again. Then, answer it again.

2. Stop expecting them to listen to you. It's just not going to happen. There's no reason to take offense. Accepting this will alleviate the disappointment of not being heard.

3. Make the conversation about them. Especially, if you're in a situation where you are spending a longer amount of time with this person. This has been extremely effective for me. I think to myself, "maybe I'm in their lives to help them feel heard". In doing this, I am able to feel like there is a purpose in a conversation.

A person's inability to have a two-way conversation is ultimately his or her own issue. It doesn't have to be your problem, too. Sometimes, contributing to a conversation is just listening. Welcome the conversation. Nod your head. Extend grace and give value to others. Answer that question one more time.

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These Are 4 Proven Ways That Vaccines Cause Autism

Stock up on those essential oils.

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Let's just start with the first (and main) point.

1. They don't.

Susan in your anti-vax group is not a scholarly source (despite her hours and hours of Google research).

2. But in case you still believe Susan...

Maybe you'll believe Autism Speaks who says, "Scientists have conducted extensive research over the last two decades to determine whether there is any link between childhood vaccinations and autism. The results of this research is clear: Vaccines do not cause autism."

3. And if Autism Speaks still didn't convince you...

Feel free to take a look at this comprehensive list of studies that all say that there is no relationship between vaccines such as the MMR vaccination and the development of autism.

4. But here's what you should know...

There have been a few studies lately that have shown that autism develops in utero aka before a baby is even born AND before a baby can even receive vaccinations.

Vaccinations have prevented COUNTLESS deaths and illnesses. Vaccination rates are continuing to fall and do you know what that means? Measles will make its way back. Whooping cough will come back. Rubella, mumps, and polio will come back and there will be no way to stop it.

So, now that you know that vaccines do not cause autism, you're welcome to go tell Susan from your anti-vax group that as well as tell her that the Earth isn't flat. But, don't forget to mention it to her that her essential oils and organic foods are not keeping her children safe from the measles or tuberculosis.

Vaccinate your children. And, besides, even IF vaccinations caused autism, wouldn't you rather have a child with a developmental disorder rather than a child who died from the measles?

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Working On My Emotional Health Is At The Top Of My To-Do List

I'm finally realizing the importance of my mental and emotional health.

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The month of April has been so eye-opening for me. For the first bit of the year, I felt like I was in a slump; like I was just going through the motions and not fully living my life.

I was letting boy drama, school stress, and my poor actions to deal with those issues take over my life. I was allowing the anger and shame from those mistakes bubble up inside me until I was just about ready to explode.

I was allowing myself to go back to old ways of coping with problems that I knew weren't healthy, but I knew would be a short-term fix.

I simply wasn't living.

Then, one day I woke up and told myself I needed to change, and that if I didn't, I'd be on this same path ten years from now... or worse. I told myself I needed to get my life back on track with the Lord and with who I want to be as a rising senior in college.

After meeting with one of the leaders at my church (btw, everyone needs a Mrs. Jenny in their life!) and with my therapist, I'm starting to realize how important my emotional health is. My way of dealing with problems hasn't been working all that well, so I know it's time to try something else.

It's all going to be a huge learning process (and at times, an uphill battle), but I know working on my emotional health now will build me to be the best I can in the future.

By learning to become more open to healthier ways of dealing with issues as they come up (like not avoiding problems and actually facing them head-on), I know I can become my best self, and that is something I'm willing to work on with my whole heart.

So, I'm learning to let go of needing to control everything in my life because honestly, wanting to control everything puts me more out of control than when I first started.

And, I encourage you to do the same.

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