I have mixed feelings about doves.

Mind you, I don't hate them, but I don't think they're the end-all-be-all of birds either. And yet, historically, and even in modern times, people seem to hold an unwavering affection for the fair-feathered symbol of peace.

Hold up, symbol of peace? Now that's where I draw the line.

Of all the cool avian emissaries the world could have selected for the universal symbol of non-violence, it chose these things?

Doves are pretty birds, nurturing birds, but by golly, they're also huge bird brains. The sheer lack of intelligence displayed in doves continually manages to baffle me. How these little folks have managed to avoid extinction will forever be a mystery to me. To be sure, I can cite example after example illustrating just how unprepared our airborne friends are to face the outside world. No more than two weeks back, I found yet another dove stuck halfway down my chimney making such a ruckus you could hear it from across the house. I'm certain I have no idea as to why it decided to raid my chimney, but it quickly became clear it was hopelessly, inescapably stuck. I would think it simple enough to avoid the small open grating atop my roof, and even more sensible not to go spelunking down below. One particularly unlucky bird felt differently however, and cost my family a small sum to remove via chimney sweep.

Conversely, a dove's poor judgment skills are not limited to their adventurous side. Indeed, the mild-mannered homemaker dove seems equally perplexed when attempting to choose a nesting location. Maybe in more natural spheres things are different, but in the urban setting, I've noticed these incredulous birds consistently build nests atop the most unsafe, unbalanced, an structurally unsound places imaginable. Piles of slates, rotting and cramped support beams, fence posts... chances are, if you can think of any bad spot for a nest, a dove has assuredly attempted to build one there. Though they come from the same evolutionary line, one may wonder why pigeons vastly outnumber their dove counterparts. The only answer I can draw is that pigeons have the better sense not make their homes in places where their eggs are constantly spilling out onto the ground.

So, I pose the question once again, why is this crazed bird our symbol of peace? They literally can't keep their eggs in one basket, they're constantly getting themselves into trouble, and, when they aren't horribly maiming themselves, they're still extremely susceptible to just about every other predator under the sun. Did the Greeks and Romans look at this frail and disturbed creature and think, "Gee, if this little guy can somehow survive despite all odds, maybe we should depict peace as something as equally desperate and fragile!" What kind of logic is that? There are plenty of other animal options to choose from that I KNOW have a healthier sum of IQ points.

I would hope that millennia after the dove received this bizarrely unfitting mantle, someone might come up with better poster-bird. Alas, such is not the case. To their credit, I do still admire doves to some degree or rather. Their minds may falter, but their hearts are remarkable strong. Seldom does one see devoted compassion in nature, and for that reason they are perhaps redeemable as an icon for love. But please, for the sake of sound logic, consider relieving them of their other station.