My Anxiety And Depression Told Me I Was Unlovable, But They Were WRONG

My Anxiety And Depression Told Me I Was Unlovable, But They Were WRONG

But I found the greatest love of all.

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Four years ago, I was with a guy who had zero tolerance for my breakdowns, my anxiety attacks and my depression. He was never there for me during my rough times, only when I was the happy and energized girl he wanted to show off to his friends. At the time, I had never been told why I felt the way I did or how to deal with my anxiety and depression. I assumed that he and others were right in saying I was crazy or that the apple didn't fall too far from the tree (speaking of my complicated family life). I thought I was too crazy and too complicated to be loved properly.

Fast forward a few months after I broke it off with that guy and moved to a new town and a new school. I met a new guy, who made me feel comfortable and beautiful, but I still hid those sides of myself in fear that I would push him away. He came from a family with no mental health issues, so he had no idea what he was getting himself into when he asked me to be his girlfriend. After a few months, he saw my first anxiety attack.

Without hesitation, he gave me a shoulder to cry on, listened to my fears and worries and assured me that he wasn't going anywhere. I was shocked. I expected him to call me crazy and break it off right then. Over the next few months, my anxiety got the best of me and I convinced myself that I didn't deserve this kind of love, that he would resent me over time because of all of my problems. Every time I broke down in front of him, I thought it was over. I thought that he wasn't going to stick around, or he was going to find a girl with fewer issues.

When I tried to end things because of this, he laughed and, once again, assured me that I wasn't a burden and he wasn't going anywhere. The last four years have been a whirlwind of family problems, depression and anxiety, but he has been there through it all. No matter how rough it gets, he's there to make sure I know that it's not my fault and there is nothing wrong with me. He goes to my doctor's appointments with me. He helps me remember to take my medicine. He checks on me when he can tell I'm not feeling great. He motivates me to get out of bed every day, but he understands when I need to take a mental health day.

My issues once told me to settle for less than I deserve, but the love he has shown me helped me figure out that I am so deserving of this love. His love has taught me that, despite my mental health problems, I am worthy of an amazing, unwavering love. Would I choose to live with anxiety and depression? No, of course not, but I know now that I am still normal, and I am capable of loving and being loved. That feeling is something irreplaceable.

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A list Of 15 Inspiring Words That Mean So Much

A single word can mean a lot.
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Positivity is so important in life. A lot of times we always go to quotes for empowerment but I have realized that just one word can be just as powerful. Here is a list of inspiring words.

1. Worthy

Realizing your self-worth is important. Self-worth can really make or break a persons personality. Always know that you are worthy of respect. And also, never compare yourself to others.

2. Courage

Be courageous in life. Life has so many opportunities so do not be scared to grasp any opportunity that comes your way. You have the ability to do anything you have your heart and mind set to do, even the things that frighten you.

3. Enough

When you are feeling down and feeling that nothing you do is ever good enough, know that you are more than enough. And yes there is always room for improvement but when it comes to my self-worth I always have to remind myself that I am enough.

4. Blessed

Be thankful. A lot of times we forget how blessed we are. We focus so much on stress and the bad things that are going on in our lives that we tend to forget all of the beautiful things we have in life.

5. Focus

Focus on your goals, focus on positive things, and focus on the ones you love. Do not focus on things that will keep you from not reaching your goals and people that do not have good intentions for your life.

6. Laugh

Laughing is one of the best forms of medicine. Life is truly better with laughter.

7. Warrior

Through the good and the bad you are a warrior. Be strong, soldier.

8. Seek

Seek new things. Allow yourself to grow in life. Do not just be stuck.

9. Faith

During the bad times, no matter the circumstances, have faith that everything will be all right.

10. Live

Start living because life is honestly way too short. Live life the way you want to live. Do not let anyone try to control you.

11. Enjoy

Enjoy everything that life has to offer. Enjoy even the littlest of things because, as I said before, life is short. And plus, there is no time to live life with regrets.

12. Believe

Believe in yourself and never stop. Believing in yourself brings so many blessings and opportunities in your life.

13. Serendipity

A lot of times we look for things to fill an empty void that we have. Usually what we are looking for comes when we are not looking at all. Your serendipity will come.

14. Create

Share your ideas with the world. Creativity brings change to your life. However you chose to use your creativity do not be scared to show your intelligence, talent, and passion.

15. Love

The world is already full of so much hate, so love unconditionally with all your heart.

Cover Image Credit: Tanveer Naseer

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Why Ignorance In Our Country Is Not Bliss

And it never will be.

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The saying ignorance is bliss is a bunch of crap. Ignorance is ignorance.

With everything going on in our country, I think it is very important for us to be educating ourselves.

You don't trust the news? Do your own digging.

You don't understand? Do some research.

You don't have the same perspective? Share it.

You only have your religious beliefs to base your knowledge? Learn before you judge.

We live in a scary world today. People judge others they've never met or before they've ever heard their story. People involve themselves in matters that they shouldn't be involved in. People are trying to regulate other people's bodies.

People don't want to learn about the issues they so strongly believe in. People don't want to hear the other side. When did party affiliation become more important than being a human being? When did men get the power to decide what women can do with their bodies? When did we stop being compassionate? When did we stop being decent human beings?

I don't want to live in a world where I have all these questions.

I don't want to live in a world where a judicial system will convict a woman who got an abortion after she was raped, but won't convict her rapist.

I don't want to live in a world where my social media timeline makes me want to cry.

I want to live in a world where everyone's opinion matters, not just the one you agree with.

I want to live in a world where everyone's voice is heard equally, not just the one's in power.

I want to live in a world where everyone's story is taken into consideration, not just the one's the government wants you to hear.

I want to live in a world where I can raise a young girl and not be afraid for her.

I want to live in a world where we do good.

I want to live in a world where we have differences, but that doesn't make us any less equal.

I want to live in a world where we don't judge before we know.

I want to live in a world where religious beliefs are respected.

I want to live in a world where it doesn't matter what political party you are.

I want to live in a world where people see right from wrong.

I want to live in a world where I am not afraid.

What kind of world do you want to live in?

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