Sammy and I have been best friends for years, and while we've only dated for a year and a half, I've learned more from him than I have from anyone else.
Sammy has cystic fibrosis, a disease that is caused by a genetic mutations in your DNA. CF affects the cells that produce mucus, sweat, and aid digestion, forcing mortality at an early age. The average life span when Sammy was born was 12 years old. Throughout the years, thanks to scientific revolutions and lots of research, the life span has been increased to about 40 years. Medicine has generously contributed to that, even though I know he hates having to rely on that to live. 2 breathing treatments three times a day, chest therapy 3 times a day, inhaled antibiotics twice a day, and extra vitamin supplements is a lot. Not to mention, the pills he has to take every time he wants to eat something and actually digest it, and all of the vitamin supplements.
Looking at Sammy from the outside, you can see how CF affects him. He's kinda shorter than other people his age, he doesn't have as much visible muscle, but so what? The first thing people ask me when they see us together is "Why is your boyfriend so short?" And every time, I explain. He has cystic fibrosis. He can't help it that he has to take steroids to stay alive. He will live a shorter life than you and I don't care if he is shorter than me. And every time I have to explain that to people, it gets a little harder. It's annoying that people proceed to judge our relationship based on stereotypical "norms" in our society and they don't believe that we could just love each other regardless of our heights.
All of this responsibility has made him think about things in a different light. Sammy has more or less, come to terms with the fact that he has a shorter life span. It sounds like it is really morbid, but it is important. He knows that he has to live his life to the fullest, which sounds so cliche, but its true. He's realized that he can pick and choose what he wants to do in his life, and he has to decide what is the most important.
Not only Sammy has to manage his cystic fibrosis; CF affects everyone in his support system. I don't say this to sound selfish. His CF causes genuine concern to those around him, and as a girlfriend, I worry... a lot. I worry about him taking medicine, him having enough medicine at school, the environment around him affecting his breathing, and so much more.
Dating Sammy has taught me so much about myself, and our relationship. Social norms of relationships are drilled into you, but I realized I don't care about what people think of our relationship. Our relationship is ours, and no one else's to judge, ridicule, or any thing else. I really learned how it feels to live in the moment, We focus so much on just enjoying all the time that we have together, and living our lives the way we want to live them. All while doing this, I learned that being selfless is a great feeling. Worrying sounds like it isn't a great way to pass the time, but I know that I'm worrying for a good reason. I am focusing my energy on someone other than me which proves to be better for our relationship.
